When to NOT Follow Your Feelings | E62

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

YAP Media Network | Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Relationships, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.7 • 890 Ratings

🗓️ 11 November 2014

⏱️ 36 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

"Follow your feelings" is the punchline of countless self-help books, and the focus of many therapy sessions. We can spend years in therapy or counseling learning how to respect and obey our emotional guidance system, which will often lead you in the right direction. But the truth is that not all feelings are the same. Sometimes, listening to your emotions will absolutely wreck your life. How do you tell the difference between healthy and unhealthy feelings? Healthy emotions are like your sense of smell. They provide you with information about the world, about yourselves, and other peoeple. Your feelings help you make decisions, and know when to move closer to something (or protect yourself). At the same time, we're all vulnerable to unhealthy feelings: Feelings that are rooted in depression, anxiety, low self esteem, trauma or impulsivity. And if we listen to those feelings we will almost invariably experience negative consequences. But the big problem is that our feelings always feel true, no matter if they are "healthy" or "unhealthy." It's therefore very difficult to differentiate between feelings that we should respect and obey, or feelings that we should over-ride. On today's episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast we're talking all about feelings - and how you can determine which ones to listen to and which ones to let go of.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, this is Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby and you're listening to the Love, Happiness, and Success Podcast.
0:07.0	Music And this is inside the mind with their lovely song, feelings.
0:36.6	Today we're talking about feelings, everybody. And in particular,
0:41.1	we're talking about when listening to your feelings is a really bad idea. And this might not be
0:48.0	a topic you're expecting, because I have to tell you, most of the time, people tell us to listen
0:53.0	to our feelings, to follow our feelings, to get to listen to our feelings, to follow our feelings,
0:55.9	to get in touch with our feelings, to express our feelings. There are so many self-help
1:01.1	books out there on the subject. All of them take the position that our feelings should be
1:06.6	the supreme wisdom for us to follow and that feelings are always good and as long as we're
1:12.5	listening to our feelings everything will be okay and so if you don't want to hear this you could
1:18.9	just turn out this podcast right now but i'm here to tell you that that is not actually always a really
1:24.2	good idea and in fact um while there are times that feelings are
1:30.2	wonderful and feelings do really tell you about your authentic truth and feelings
1:34.8	should be honored and respected there are also a lot of times when that is just
1:39.7	not true listening to your feelings sometimes is a terrible idea. Not just as a terrible idea,
1:46.3	it will wreck your life if you listen to your feelings. And it can be really confusing to tell
1:53.5	the difference between, okay, so I'm having a feeling right now. Is this a good, healthy feeling
1:57.7	that I should listen to? Or is this a bad feeling that Dr. Lisa said
2:04.3	will destroy my life if I listen to it. So that is what we're going to be talking about today
2:09.6	on the love, happiness and success podcast is how to tell the difference between healthy
2:15.3	and unhealthy feelings and which ones to obey and which ones to
2:20.0	simply acknowledge and release, cope with, move along, shoo away, whatever you need to do
	...

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