When Kids Say “No” Or Ask “Why?” Reflexively

Calm Parenting Podcast

Kirk Martin

Relationships, Education, Parenting, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Kids & Family

4.7 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 21 April 2024

⏱️ 26 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

When Kids Say “No” Or Ask “Why?” Reflexively

So either your child is inherently a rebellious, defiant, difficult kid…or there is something else going on when you ask them to do something and they respond by saying, “No” or asking “Why?” Kirk explains why your kids ask why and how you can get your kids to be responsible without escalating situations.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	So I bet I have a way for even reluctant teens and tweens to spend time with you.
0:05.4	Sit and better on the sofa, wrapped in the heavenly softness of the new cozy earth bubble cuddle
0:10.8	blanket. It is so ridiculously soft. Your toddlers, your teens, pets, even your spouse is going to
0:16.8	want to cuddle with you. And you will have the best talks all wrapped up together. We absolutely
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0:29.5	and your sensory kids, forget about it. They're going to try to steal the cozy earth bubble
0:33.7	cuddle blanket from your room. I'd have them do extra chores to buy their own, but then you
0:38.6	might not be able to get them out of bed. Look, your bed shouldn't just be a place to sleep. It should be
0:43.4	your happy place. Use the cozy earth bamboo sheets. We'd love those. And this new blanket,
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1:01.1	So do you have a child who when given instructions reflexively responds by saying no or asking why?
1:08.6	Of course you do. And it's irritating. Is this just a defiant child who's purposefully being difficult, or is something else going on? That is what we are going to discuss on today's episode of the Calm Parenting Podcast. Welcome, this is Kirk Martin. You can find us at celebrate calm.com. If you need to help, reach out to our son, Casey, C-A-S-E-Y at celebrate calm. Tell us about
1:28.9	your family, ages of kids, what he's struggling with. We will get back to you usually pretty quickly
1:33.0	and very personally because that's our mission to help. So here's the thing. If you're a generally
1:38.4	compliant rule-following person by nature, you're going to struggle with your strong will child. Because if you
1:45.9	view your child as a rebellious, defiant, pig-headed, unmotivated kid, nothing, absolutely,
1:53.0	nothing you say or do will work. It will all backfire. Your child will resist and shut down.
1:59.0	And you'll slowly grow apart and resent each other.
2:02.7	How's that for the beginning of a podcast? I just realized that's kind of hard hitting.
2:06.5	But look, it's just the truth, right? Here's the hard part. When someone asks you to do something,
2:12.0	your first thought is you just do it. But that's not what your strong will child thinks or does. Their first thought is either an
	...

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