What is the weirdest thing that a medical patient flat out denied?

I'm a nurse. We had a patient come into the operating room for brain surgery, probably mid-50s guy with a nice head of light brown hair.

Before the patient comes into the actual operating room, we ask them a series of questions, including whether they've had implants, jewelry, non-hospital clothes, stuff like

that. The guy says no to all these questions. After the patient gets put to sleep, the surgeon

grabbed his hair to start shaving it off, because, you know, brain surgery. All his hair

peeled off because he was wearing a wig and didn't tell us. We almost shaved his hairpiece

because he wouldn't admit to anyone that he wore it.

Being Purganninant and also having never so much as touched a man. People actually believe women

can get preggers in a public pool or so after their parents did the deed in the jacuzzi,

and the girl uses the jacuzzi and conceives that way. Anything but admit that they did the deed with someone in front of their parents.

I'm not a doctor, but a nurse.

I had a patient come in with a toothpick in his member,

refused to tell me how it got there and insisted he was picking his teeth and it just fell in.

I admitted a guy for chest pain.

As part of the workup, I did a urine substance screen which came back positive for using white snow. After the rest of his cardiac workup was negative, I said to him,

Good news, you didn't have a heart attack.

It's likely that your chest pain was caused by using that white snow.

His answer was, uh, I didn't use that. See, I was at a party

and people had some lines of it out on the table. As I was walking by, an oscillating fan blew it into my

face, which is why my pee came back like that. Yeah, got it. I'm a pediatric dentist,

and this one throws me through a loop every time, so I'll share it.

When I sedate kids, they have to be NPO for eight hours, so I always ask if they had anything

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