What is the most blatant lie that a salesperson told when trying to make a sale?

My grandma was told she should get a faster internet subscription because she lived on a hill

and the electrons struggled to get up to her.

I asked a hot dog vendor in New York City how to find the subway.

Then I tried to purchase a Pepsi.

Knowing that I was a tourist, he asked for five bucks.

I said, the sign says 250.

And he says, oh, that's for the warm ones.

This one's cold, so it's $5.

At a market in Mexico, I asked,

Hey, what's this thing made out of wool?

Salesperson said, yes, of course.

Oh, I'm allergic to wool. Oh, it's not wool. The similar thing happened to me in China.

The salesperson said, this is carved out a real elephant tusk. That's why it's so expensive.

I said, oh, that's terrible. The poor elephant. Salesperson then switches tech. Oh, just kidding. It's,

it's hard plastic. $10 and it's yours. Oh, those are disposable flash drives for four bucks.

They really only work a couple of times. What you really want is one of the competitors' drives

for 15. Talking to a D-link representative on the phone. They go, uh, yeah, what you need to do is update the firmware on your router, but for us to install the update for you, we'll have to charge you for the service. I said, oh, okay, I just found the update on your website. I just have to download and install it, right? I can do that myself. Uh, no, if you do that without our help, you could destroy your router, with the file from your website, following the directions from your website. Yes. This random guy in a van outside my house trying to sell stakes. Hey dude, you live here? Uh, yeah, what do you need? I have a bunch of leftover meat and I need to get rid of it. You can just have it for free.

Oh, sure. Come on in. He enters the house. Okay, here's our prices. I thought you said it was free.

Well, at these prices, it's practically free. Get out. You should really be careful about letting

strangers into your home, no matter how tasty their meat is. Some of them just want to get a peek inside

in case they want to break in later. The last commenter raises a valid point. We should be as

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