Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom,

and insights from parents just like you all over the world.

Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

What do they think when you come home?

Here's a test of your own childhood. Imagine you're sitting

on the couch watching TV. You're in the kitchen making a snack. You and your friend are hanging out

upstairs. And then you hear the garage door go up or you hear keys in the front door, the car

pulling into the driveway. As you take yourself back to that moment, what's the immediate sensory reaction you

have? What's the energy or the feeling that comes through your body? The comedian Jim Gaffkin

told a sad story on Mark Maren's podcast about this exact scene. My dad would come home and I'd be like,

who's that guy? He explained. You're like,

ah, hi. Like some of my initial acting, he says, was acting excited to see this stranger. How do you

think your kids feel when they hear you coming home? Is it a feeling of relief and excitement,

safety? Or is it fear? Is it anxiety? Is it obligation? Oh, now I have

to pretend to be a certain way or now I have to take care of this person who's supposed to be

taken care of me. This is a vibe test. Are you passing? We've talked before about how to

evaluate our success as parents.

Perhaps instead of judging ourselves on their grades or how well they're doing in sports or what college they're on track to get into,

we could evaluate ourselves based on what kind of presence we have in our own homes, what they think and feel, how they change when we walk into the room.

Unleash your limitless potential with Hoka. Conceived in the mountains, Hoka footwear offers unparalleled cushioning and support for a smooth ride. We push the

boundaries of innovation with world champions and everyday athletes. Hoka is a bold movement that

...