Weekend Football, California Schemin', Football's Worst
Off the Ball Podcast
BBC
4.6 • 606 Ratings
🗓️ 2 February 2026
⏱️ 61 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
The most petty and ill informed podcast in the world! Weekend football preview, Faking it, Football's worst, IKEA XI, Terracing Teaser with rapper Billy Boyd and Tam McManus joining Stuart and Tam. Hear the remarkable story of the Scottish rappers who took the music world by storm by pretending to be from the west coast of America for 3 years, the basis of the new film from James McAvoy. Who are the worst people in football and... if the answer is 'Haggis, Neeps and Tatties' what is the question? All this plus the IKEA Team of the Week featuring Scott Allen Key, John 'Meatball' McGinn and Harald Flatpack!
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | BBC sounds, music, radio, podcasts. |
| 0:06.0 | Greetings! |
| 0:07.8 | Welcome to another edition of the Off the Ball podcast with Stuart Cosgrove and Tam Cowan. |
| 0:13.1 | For full terms and conditions of use, please go to the website, BBC.co.org. |
| 0:17.8 | com, off the ball and follow the links to the podcast page. I woke up in a Soho Door where a policeman knew my name |
| 0:38.8 | He said |
| 0:40.0 | You can't go sleep at home tonight |
| 0:42.3 | If you can get up and walk away |
| 0:44.5 | I stack a crack to the undercrime |
| 0:48.6 | But the freeze grew black my head |
| 0:51.0 | I remember |
| 0:53.3 | Yes William Boyd is with us |
| 0:55.8 | Billy |
| 0:56.1 | You know the one thing I wanted to hear you say |
| 0:59.7 | I can't quite remember it |
| 1:01.7 | Jim Spence was great |
| 1:03.0 | The boy that goes in at the chip shop |
| 1:05.1 | And it ends with a niny-an-in-aw |
| 1:07.4 | Yeah, that's a very dundee saying that one |
| 1:10.4 | Yeah, what is it? The whole sentence. |
| 1:13.2 | Do you know what? I'm not even, I'm going to pull you up on this one just now as well, actually. Because I'm actually not from Dundee, I'm from Arbroath. So to save you getting all the complaints in, and me getting complaints, we're not representing where I'm from, I'm actually from Routhawth. But the story started in Dundee |
| 1:25.3 | And that's right |
... |
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