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Ladies & Tangents

We were secretly engaged! ME TOO! - Trauma Bonding

Ladies & Tangents

Ladies & Tangents | Para Pods

Society & Culture

4.93.2K Ratings

🗓️ 14 September 2021

⏱️ 96 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

CW - toxic relationships, emotional & physical This is a tough one. In today's episode we discuss something that has been one of our most highly requested topics, trauma bonding. We know the world is heavy right now, but something we've realized is that in order to feel lighter ourselves, we must first identify the weight we're carrying around. Through this discussion, which SURPRISE went way longer than anticipated, we felt validated and freed from fears, resentment and guilt that we didn't realize still lived within us even years after leaving. We hope to give you the space to heal as well. This is a 2 part episode- part 1 today, 2 next week. I told you it went long! In part 1, we discuss the 7 stages of trauma bonding and what it can look like inside an unhealthy, toxic relationship. Please skip this episode if you are not in a place to process or bring up or hear some really tough memories. You matter more than a listen. We love you!   RESOURCES FOR VICTIMS AND SURVIVORS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE NATIONAL CRISIS ORGANIZATIONS AND ASSISTANCE https://ncadv.org/resources   Resource- Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship by Lauren Kozlowski   Find the book here! Audible book - https://www.googleadservices.com/pagead/aclk?sa=L&ai=DChcSEwiDh5Duqv7yAhWjIa0GHRauDtQYABALGgJwdg&ohost=www.google.com&cid=CAESQeD2OinSoUPUoHeUPHnnroJghNzifVOtUwiU2cYaoiZyKxMQ99flIxCfYx-gd-moxAMGnw2xA7eS3Ci5YoWgNqph&sig=AOD64_2seMuJoXGjEncJUgvFpWRvQMuOPg&q&adurl&ved=2ahUKEwjrwYLuqv7yAhVBxZ4KHT0CDD8Q0Qx6BAgCEAE Amazon - https://www.amazon.com/Trauma-Bonding-Understanding-Narcissistic-Relationship/dp/1393216633   WE'RE GOING ON TOUR - https://www.ladiesandtangents.com/live-show WE’RE ON CAMEO - https://www.cameo.com/ladiesandtangents WE'RE ON PATREON - patreon.com/ladiesandtangents MERCH - https://ladiesandtangents.kingsroadmerch.com/ *NEW* SUBMIT YOUR STORIES - landtstories@gmail.com FOLLOW ALONG WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA - @ladiesandtangents   GAZA/WEST BANK RESOURCES- https://medium.com/@scholarscoalition/for-immediate-release-u-s-4c2aecd11535 https://irusa.org/middle-east/palestine/ https://buildpalestine.com/2021/05/15/trusted-organizations-to-donate-to-palestine/ https://www.vox.com/2015/5/14/18093732/israel-palestine-misconceptions https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/52045757   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hey guys. I'm Jerry. I'm Sierra. We're ladies. And we tangent. Fred, he's like, I didn't want to know back then the animals died.

0:23.4

And I was like, no, yeah, but you're so much more like empathetic like so he goes when would have been a good time to tell you that animals dies. So then he goes, well, okay, mom, I'm just telling you that when I have children of my own, this is my son, when I have children of my own, I'm going to tell them that they just went to a better place and you better not say.

0:48.4

Okay, I'll let you pair. You want to pair. We'll see if you still feel like that. Yeah.

0:53.6

How rude. Yeah. Well, those of you who missed the beginning of this story know as mad that Sierra did lie there four years ago. Are we starting?

1:01.2

I mean, that was a, I don't know. I thought that was a good story to clue, but we don't know.

1:05.8

So, so I had a kitten that passed away. She, first of all, I took, he said, why didn't you warn me? And I was like, I didn't know she was going to die.

1:14.4

No one else like that much of a heads up. And she was a rescue kitten. So I mean, I guess that I should have known there was some, it was a possibility risk.

1:22.4

And she was also like, tears of history, risk going kittens. I love, I love rescue in animals. It's just the best that meme.

1:31.4

She was the only one that passed away. I will say that the meme of the Tarzan. I'm your mother.

1:38.4

And I'm its mother now that's here with kittens. Yes. Seriously. We have a lot of stray cats around here. Yeah.

1:45.4

And if I just, I don't know, I have a soft spot for cats because I feel like cats get the shaft. Everybody loves a dog.

1:52.4

But I feel like people see stray cats and they're like, yeah. And so I want to be like, I'll take you in.

1:58.4

Anyways, it died and I know I was upset with me because you told him that it died. Well, I thought that was the best thing to do.

2:04.4

And I said that it went to heaven, even though I'm not even sure if I believe that. But I was like, this is going to soften the blow.

2:10.4

The cats in a better place.

2:13.4

Blah, blah, blah. And he was like, just really wish he would have told me it went like to a farmer.

2:19.4

And I was like, okay, well next time an animal dies online.

2:23.4

Well, I know that Shane's parents said that to him.

2:27.4

My parents said it to me and it devastated me when I found out.

2:30.4

Yeah, same thing because Shane was like, why can't we just get it back then?

2:35.4

Like it leaves the ambiguity that like the animal's still there or something?

2:39.4

Well, that's what I want to be like, no, I don't think you remember yourself for years ago.

...

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