There's fixer uppers and then there's just there's properties that, you know, like toxic dumps can fix it.

Welcome back to Dear Shandy listeners. Hello, Andy. Hello there. It is caller day. It is. We are joined today by a lovely caller named Emily. Emily. Thank you so much for joining us. Hello, Emily. I thank you for having me.

Do you mind giving us your age, your city, or region, whatever you're comfortable sharing the age of the person in question and I refreshed myself on your email.

And I know there is one and also your story.

So I am based in LA area. I am 27 years old and the person in question is 29.

Okay. Nice ages. Nice age difference. That's a good age difference.

Okay. Let's hear your story. Yeah. So I met my ex boyfriend about two and a half years ago.

We met on a dating app actually. But when we met, I honestly didn't really have the intention of it turning into anything serious as Marso just like trying to put myself out there.

But I met him the second week I was on on the app and we really hit it off our first date for context was like eight hours long.

So we just like we had really great conversation.

So fast forward four months later, we decided to make it official.

And so we became a lot more serious by then. And one thing that really put a strain in our relationship was just the lack of physical intimacy.

He suffers from having a reptile dysfunction. So it was a bit of a sensitive issue.

And I didn't want to press him on it because I know that that's a very sensitive thing. And I think it was very emasculating for him.

So I kind of just pushed it aside for a little bit. But after some time, especially a year into the relationship, I started to address it a little bit more.

And I did that by just asking him like, how are you doing with this? Like is there anything I can do to help? I just like really wanted to be supportive and not pressure him.

And it was very difficult for him. I could try therapy, but therapist he got was just not the greatest. So it just turned him off to that.

So we ended up ending our relationship about almost two years into it. And I think this is honestly probably the biggest reason because our relationship was really, I feel like it was really solid.

I feel like we had a really good like friendship foundation to which I feel like I noticed missing in a lot of relationships I've seen.

And even my therapist, I've talked to her a lot about it. And she honestly thinks that if we were able to explore physical intimacy that that might have saved our relationship because he wasn't able to, he basically like he lost his spark for me.

So that's why we ended things and decided to just become friends.

So you are friends now. Yeah, we're friends. Wait, sorry. He said that he lost his spark for you.

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