Wanting Your Partner to Change VS Accepting Them as They Are: Episode 267
EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Aaron & Jocelyn Freeman
5.0 • 589 Ratings
🗓️ 6 December 2022
⏱️ 34 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
It's likely that you have said one of these two things to your partner. "Why don't you just accept me for who I am" or "I really need you to change this _____". At some point in your relationship you will find yourselves getting more upset about things that your partner does, says, or ways they show up for you. Of course relationships are about supporting the needs of the other person but a big question arises at this junction… Where is the line of accepting my partner the way they are versus being able to ask for a change to be made.
This is a thin line between resigning yourself to things continuing to not serve you or the relationship and constantly asking your partner to be different. This is especially when it comes to who they are as a person and their base personality traits.
In this episode you will understand where this line is between change and acceptance so that at the end of the day you both are able to feel accepted as the person you are and be on a healthy path to growing into even better people and partners for each other.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello and welcome to the Empowered Couples podcast where here you get modern, non-boring relationship |
| 0:05.6 | advice for you and your partner to communicate like pros, fight smarter, and stay on the same team |
| 0:11.3 | no matter the challenge that you face. I am one of your hosts, Aaron Freeman. And I'm Jocelyn Freeman, |
| 0:15.7 | but you all just know us as the Freeman's. And this episode, what I'm really excited about, |
| 0:20.3 | is about wanting your partner to change |
| 0:22.6 | versus accepting them as they are. |
| 0:24.6 | And I know some of you hearing that just said, yes, please, because I just wish I could |
| 0:30.6 | be accepted more for who I am. |
| 0:32.6 | I wish I didn't hear these remarks of wishing I was this way or wishing that I would change |
| 0:37.8 | this. |
| 0:38.8 | And we're going to cover a really important element of like what is quote unquote too much |
| 0:42.7 | to ask of each other to shift versus what's acceptable. |
| 0:46.5 | Yeah, because you might have gotten to a place. |
| 0:48.7 | And in our coaching, this really comes up a lot. |
| 0:51.8 | You know, I need my partner to change this or to stop doing these certain |
| 0:56.1 | things. And it is a good question in the relationship coaching realm, in the personal growth |
| 1:02.2 | realm. Where is the line between just accepting them as they are your partner? And then you |
| 1:09.4 | might be again saying that for yourself like accepting me |
| 1:11.9 | this is who I am versus actually being okay to request change like where is that line it's it's such an |
| 1:19.6 | important question and I do think there's a difference between change which is typically when you identify, yeah, there's a pattern here. |
| 1:30.6 | There are some habits and it's something that we could really transform. |
| 1:35.8 | And then there's growth, which to me is more we're focused on getting better. |
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