Hello!

And welcome to Very Amusing, your one-stop shop for the stories, secrets, and shenan of a popcorn-fueled theme park journalist.

I'm Carly Wiesel, and I am pleased, displeased to announce that I've essentially taken on a new full-time job,

and that is desperately, desperately trying to find new clothes for summer.

I don't know what is going on out there.

I've been scouring, I call it mall. I've

been scouring every single mall brand that exists. I'm talking anthropology, free people,

Abercrumpy, Zara, Old Navy. I've been going through every single item on these websites,

desperately trying to find something that's summery that's made of cotton or linen that I can wear

in really, really hot temperatures and something that still feels like me that isn't like a solid color that's summery that's made of cotton or linen that I can wear in really, really hot temperatures and something that still feels like me, that isn't like a solid color that's kind of fun

because I love fun clothes. I've been scouring all of them, and it is taking more time than I

ever anticipated, and I got to tell you, there's nothing out there. There's just kind of nothing

out there. When did they make every shirt with a tie in front?

I'm sorry, sometimes I have to be around adults and like business. I almost said comrades,

business colleagues. Like I have to sometimes be hot and busy. You know what I mean? Not hot.

Like, like, ooh, I'm hot. Like hot. Like, it's hot out. Global warming is here. It has arrived. And not have to be, like, warm and also wear this stuff.

It's very stressful to me. It's very stressful. I'm clearly, like, very wrapped up in it, if you can't

tell. I had to, before I restarted my computer to begin recording this podcast, I had to close about 250 windows from zara.com.

And let me tell you, half their summer clothes are made out of polyester.

Like, I don't know what's going up, but that's not besides the point.

We're not here to talk about that.

We are here to talk about that Zara is selling vegetable brooches, like little pin,

...