Violent Fantasies and Parenting
Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.6 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 29 October 2025
⏱️ 97 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.
00:00 Do violent fantasies mean anything?
24:50 Recent celebrity losses
43:31 How did Rebecca develop self-care behaviors?
1:03:41 How can parents adjust to their children becoming more individuated?
1:16:24 How can parents navigate their own anxiety around the state of the world?
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October 29, 2025
The Psychology In Seattle Podcast ®
Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Rebecca, I have some interesting emails, as usual. |
| 0:02.9 | I'm excited. |
| 0:03.5 | I always save the most difficult emails for you. |
| 0:07.6 | I take that as a compliment. |
| 0:09.6 | I hope so. |
| 0:10.5 | I hope so. |
| 0:11.9 | So anonymous listener, she says, I'm writing to ask for your thoughts on a situation involving my former psychiatrist. |
| 0:18.7 | When I was 17, I was hospitalized for eight months and treated for |
| 0:23.1 | anorexia under his care. During that time, I experienced frequent punishments and felt emotionally |
| 0:29.1 | unsafe. So just chiming in, she doesn't go into detail about what that means, but I think it sounds |
| 0:35.6 | like he was either in charge or it was from him. So punishments |
| 0:41.4 | and felt emotionally unsafe. Now, we don't know what actually happened, but that's the way it felt |
| 0:45.0 | to her. I never had romantic feelings toward him, mostly resentment and anger, but I developed |
| 0:51.9 | recurring fantasies about him having violent sex with me. These fantasies are |
| 0:56.8 | disturbing and confusing. I often don't enjoy them. Is this a sex therapy question? Well, it's a sex |
| 1:03.9 | question. Okay. I often don't enjoy these fantasies, or I only enjoy parts of the fantasies and they seem more about surrender and |
| 1:13.6 | escape than sexual desire. Surrender and escape than sexual desire. Rebecca, what do you think of |
| 1:20.8 | this so far? Well, it's, this is common. So we've had, we've talked about this before, that |
| 1:26.5 | whatever happens within your own mind is okay |
| 1:30.9 | what's interesting about this is that you know these aren't quite fantasies there's like |
| 1:36.8 | there's something else going on here how do you define fantasy well you should want to say, can you say usually in rape fantasies? |
| 1:47.0 | There's a lot of control by the fantasizer about exactly who will rape them, where they will |
... |
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