Mary Cassian says, in any situation you can focus on the negative and complain, or you can find the positive and be grateful.

One way or the other will become a pattern and a way of life.

And if you choose the negative part, that's who you will become.

And if you choose the positive part, that's who you will become. And if you choose the positive part, that's who you will become.

This is the Revive Our Hearts podcast for Friday, January 30th, 2015.

All this week, my friend Mary Cassian has been our guest teacher talking about ways to glorify God and encourage others through our speech.

She's talked about listening, resolving conflict, encouraging others, and avoiding complaining. If you missed any of this helpful series, you can hear it at revive our hearts.com.

Now, as Mary's been teaching this series, we've had a live audience here in our studio.

And today, Mary's going to have a Q&A time with those women about ways to live out these

principles in the real world. We'll start with a member

of our audience who wants to grow in communicating with her fiance. She'd like to know how to best

respond when he doesn't listen the way that she would like. He has a tendency to have a hard time

talking about things sometimes and what he'll do is he'll laugh when we're having a serious conversation.

And it's very, very frustrating to me.

And so I was wondering, where would you say that would fall in one of these?

And if it doesn't, what would you say about that?

Because the fact that even if he does hear me and laughing about it, I feel like it's not taken seriously.

So it's not thoroughly listening.

So I wonder if you had a comment on that.

I would say that's probably defensiveness.

That's, you know, just defensiveness, perhaps wanting to keep the

tough guy image or perhaps fear of vulnerability. And I think men particularly have hard times

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