the only common denominator with the couples that reported the highest level of

marital satisfaction, they were basically given a spousal report card and said

rank your spouse in categories like generosity, kindness, loyalty. And the ones

that were happiest were the ones who ranked their spouse highest and every

category then their spouse had ranked themselves. So I think it's made up of you

if you could always see you like I see you.

Welcome to Family Life Today where we want to help you pursue the relationships

that matter most. I'm Shelby Abbott and your hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson.

You can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com or on the Family Life app.

This is Family Life Today.

All right, I'm going to ask you a question you better know the answer my greatest

moment on a golf course. When you shot under par by a lot. I've never done that.

I shot par once or twice. Never under last week. I had birdie and almost an

ego. But no, here's the thing. You remember and I won't go into it because I

listen to her. I've heard this but playing in a charity celebrity golf

thing and a woman finds out she walks up to me and says, so you're a marriage

expert. That's what I hear. I'm like, no, I'm not. But she says, I'm in my second

marriage. What's the problem with marriage? And I have 10 seconds. And I go, I

can answer that in one word. She goes, really? I go selfishness, classic response.

This is why I never forget. She goes, you are so right. My first husband was so selfish.

It is like, oh my goodness. That's how we all think. We can't see it in ourselves.

We see it in somebody else. Yes. And that all begins in the mind. And we've got Ted

...