Do you remember that song by how to wait?

It came out years and years ago, but it used to go,

What is love?

Baby don't hurt me.

Well, that is the new theme song for Monday Night Raw,

but instead of saying, what is love, you say,

what is raw, and then it's just question mark,

question mark, question mark, question mark,

because recently, it doesn't make any sense.

My name is Simon Mellowwood, I want culture wrestling,

and I suppose it's my job to try and connect those dots,

which is why we're going to take the finger of power,

and we're going to give the good bits of down,

and we're going to give the bad bits enough.

And if you're now saying Simon, you got that wrong.

Well, I'm just mimicking what WWE is now doing

every single week.

What a card I am.

Let's up those doubts.

So we're all starting with T-Bar and Maze,

cutting another promo about extinction,

even though so far, they have made nothing extinct.

...