Oh, he's cute. Mr. I can never sleep when I'm traveling. He's hugging his pillow like a sloth on a branch.

He couldn't sleep before. Now listen to him. Sounds like an elephant with a chest infection.

Well, they call him a dreamer. And now they're right.

All aboard, Mr. I can never sleep when I'm traveling.

Find all the comfort you need in the quiet lounge.

Piando Ferries, there is another way. We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick.

We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick. We speak to you from our present, which we can

only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.

Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this

monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.

So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology

to decrypt our transmissions, this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule.

This is the omnibus. Oh, You have accessed entry 1354 dot I S 2915 certificate number

2765 Tylenol murders.

I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there

on Melody Lane with all the other rich people.

And I want him brought right here.

And I want to look him straight in the eye. I want to tell him what a cheap lying,

no good rotten fore-flushing low-life snake-licking, dirt-eating inbred, over-stuffed,

ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, hopeless, heartless, bug-eyed, stiff-legged

...