I have some news. Now I realize this is going to come as quite a shock for everybody. I hate to do it like this. I hate to inform everyone this way, but I'm going to go become a horse jockey.

I'm retiring here at the first and I'm going to go become a horse jockey. What's so funny? You don't think there can be six foot eight, 235 pound horse jockeys?

It is ridiculous isn't it? Just to think about that of course, no I'm not retiring. I'm not going anywhere and I'm not going to be a horse jockey. You know why I'm not going to be a horse jockey?

It's not just because I'm happy here at the first. It's because I'm not qualified. Not everyone is qualified to do everything. I'm too big. I can't be a horse jockey. Those guys weigh like 75 pounds. They're all like five feet tall.

I'm never going to be a horse jockey ever because I'm not qualified for the job. Why do people take such offense when you talk about qualified and not qualified in this country?

I don't understand it. Why are all of our politicians so old? And that's not me being anti-old people. And I don't really care if that's what you think anyway, but I love old people.

There's nothing I enjoy more than sitting down, talking to somebody with a lifetime of wisdom, especially old vets. I really, really love talking to old vets.

By the way, parents, quick side note here starting inside track. Take your kids down to the local VFW now and then sit down with one of the old timers and hear some stories. It's good for them. Believe me.

Language may be a little rough, but it's good for them. But setting that aside, old people were fine. You shouldn't be running the United States of America when you're a cadaver.

Why are all the people who run this country so old? And you know what? On their level, we were just speaking about it from their point of view. Why do you want to be doing this when you're so old?

Now, full disclosure, before I go into Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer and Mitch McConnell, we got a great show for you tonight.

Before I go into this, I do understand that I approach all this stuff a little bit differently. And what do I mean by all this stuff? Well, you know, this isn't how I grew up. I didn't grow up doing media, TV and radio stuff.

I have a construction guy, and a Marine, I sold RVs, I washed dishes, I washed golf clubs, I washed cars. That's a lot of washing. I lived a normal life.

So maybe that's the reason, but I don't understand the obsession with staying famous if that's what you want to call it. I don't get wrong. It's fun. I get to talk on the radio, get to talk on TV. I do this for a living. They pay me to do this. It's awesome. But when I'm 81, you're not going to see me here.

At some point in time, I'm going to say, Sianara, and I'm going to go read books and watch old people documentaries just like I do now. And I'm going to hang out with my kids and maybe grandkids if I have any by then.

And I'm just going to kind of go about my life. I'm going to eat as much red lobster as humanly possible before the good Lord takes me home.

And I frankly don't understand aging rock stars. Why are the Rolling Stones doing tours at 80? My goodness, go home and take some metamusel. Why is Nancy Pelosi running for Congress again?

Hello, it's Nancy. Thank you for the opportunity to share some thoughts with you. This election is crucial. Nothing less is at stake than our democracy.

But as we say, we don't agonize. We organize. And that is why I am running for re-election to Congress and respectfully seek your support. I'd be greatly honored by it and grateful for it. Thank you so much.

All right, keep in mind. Nancy Pelosi is not only 81 years old. That's older than Joe Biden. That's older than Donald Trump. Nancy Pelosi is filthy rich.

She's worth tens of millions of dollars. Her husband's a big rich guy. Just bought a brand new mansion in Florida. Okay, so she's old. She's 81. She's very, very rich. And I know you hate her. I hate her too.

But she's the most successful female politician in the history of the United States of America. She is. It's not even a question. No one else is even close to reaching that level of power and success.

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