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The Virtual Couch

Turning Negativity Into Insight: Julie De Jesus on Interviewing Kevin Franke and What the Comments Reveal About Us

The Virtual Couch

Tony Overbay LMFT

Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.9 • 668 Ratings

🗓️ 22 August 2025

⏱️ 63 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Tony sits down with his friend and Love, ADHD co-host, Julie De Jesus, to unpack her recent interview with Kevin Franke, ex-husband of Ruby Franke. Ruby, the former “8 Passengers” YouTuber, pled guilty in late 2023 to multiple counts of aggravated child abuse and, along with her business partner Jodi Hildebrandt, was sentenced in February 2024 to up to 30 years in prison under Utah law. While Tony originally planned to ask Julie about Kevin, the conversation took a different turn: the tidal wave of comments Julie received after posting her interview. With humor, honesty, and therapeutic insight, Tony and Julie read through some of those YouTube comments out loud, responding in real time. They explore why people are so quick to judge, why emotions often masquerade as facts, and how online criticism reveals more about the commenter than the person being critiqued. You’ll hear candid reflections on: What Kevin’s story stirs up in people (and why) How emotional immaturity shows up in the comment section (projection, black-and-white thinking, and mistaking feelings for truth) Why leaving abusive situations is never as simple as outsiders believe The concept of “whole object relations” — holding multiple emotions at once How Julie navigated negativity while staying grounded and authentic This episode is part deep dive into psychology, part raw behind-the-scenes of content creation, and part hilarious reading of unfiltered internet comments. If you’ve ever wondered why strangers online lash out—or how to handle criticism with both compassion and boundaries—this one’s for you. 00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview 00:33 Julie De Jesus and Her Interview with Kevin Frankie 01:11 Handling Criticism and Emotional Reactions 02:40 Understanding Emotional Maturity 03:55 Navigating Online Criticism 07:40 Promoting the Upcoming Cruise 11:51 The Future of Love A DHD Podcast 12:24 Deep Dive into Kevin Frankie's Interview 21:04 Personal Reflections and Recognitions 31:30 Introduction to Kate's Family Dynamics 31:32 Exploring Religious Roles and Power Dynamics 32:23 Personal Reflections and Family Dynamics 35:00 Commentary on Interview Techniques 36:26 Debating Faith and Atheism 38:40 Addressing Online Criticism 42:20 Therapy and Personal Growth 53:05 Inner Child and Emotional Healing 01:00:02 Concluding Thoughts and Reflections Contact Tony at contact@tonyoverbay.com to learn more about his Emotional Architects men's group. And visit https://julie-dejesus.com/cruise to learn more about Tony and his friend Julie De Jesus's "I See You Living" cruise, a 5-night Western Caribbean Cruise from January 24-29, 2026 aboard the Royal Caribbean Cruise Line.

Transcript

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1:00.0

Welcome to the virtual couch. Please take a seat for pillars, emotional maturity,

1:08.0

stay yourself worth, run so deep.

1:11.0

You are not broken.

1:13.6

You're a human.

1:14.6

So check that out.

1:16.6

You don't know what you don't know is what it's all about.

1:22.6

Hey everybody, welcome to today's episode of fill in the blank with your podcast.

1:26.6

I think this is going to run on Love

1:27.7

ADHD, possibly waking up to narcissism as well as a virtual couch. Regardless, I'm your host,

1:32.6

Tony Overbay. I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist. And today's episode is a special one

1:37.3

because I get to talk with one of my good friends, Julie de Jesus, formerly known as Julie

1:42.9

Lee. You may know Julie as my co-host on Love ADHD.

1:47.0

She was passing through Arizona, so we got her in studio. And she recently had a chance to interview

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