This one's for you tonight.

Okay, let's get started.

Just raise your glasses high.

This one sweet turtle time.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, life is beautiful, so slay we must.

Those were the immortal words of Kristen Doty, which she uttered last night after burning pieces of paper, right?

Yeah, that was amazing. The full return of the Witches of WeHo. She brought her crystals. She had her whole little toolkit. She had something that she was going to shove up Sandoval's ass. Yeah. She had a little jar of Vaseline. But Ariana said, no, no, no lube. No lube. No spit. That thing goes up dry up his ass.

Well, my name is Riley Hamilton.

And I'm Amy Scarletta.

And this is turtle time.

I am struggling today.

I think I debated whether or not to tell our beautiful, wonderful listeners that you and I are not doing good today because it's like, why are we not giving the people who listen our all? But we are going to

try to give it our all, but we also have something that happened to us last night that caused

pain today. Would you agree with that? We went hard. We went hard. For those of you who don't know

everything that Amy and I do, last night we hosted, I'll call it what it was, hosted thanks to

our very good friend, Eileen. She let us be able to host a Vanderpump Rules finale watch party at a beautiful bar called Junkyard Dog.

Yes.

Right in Beautiful Silver Lake.

That's right.

Yeah, we pre-gamed watching the episode in utter silence at my apartment so that we could hear every word.

And then we walked over to Junk yard dog and watched it with a big

group and everyone was hooting and hollering. It was a blast. Yeah, it was best case scenario. I was so worried

...