Oh, well, hello there, folks. I'm Dave Holmes. Welcome to Troubled Waters. The show that treats popular

culture is the most important kind of culture because, well, frankly, it's your lifeline to sanity right now.

On Troubled Waters, two teams of comedians will compete in a pop culture battle royale to win this

battle. Each team will be called upon to use their smarts, their rhetorical skills,

the college degrees they're still paying off. Maybe with a three-day leniency period, but

probably not. To earn the coveted troubled waters title, Pundit Emeritus. The title of Pundit

Emeritus automatically gives a person's opinion on, let's say, the new Duolipa album, more weight than a

civilians, unless they don't like it, in which case, get out of my life. You're fired. You're listening

to Troubled Waters. Let's meet our teams.

Let's meet our teams.

Yeah, we just did.

It's you.

You.

Yeah, with the headphones, the earbuds there.

Blasting this out of your car on Bluetooth while you're driving around an empty city.

You are our teams for this very special episode.

That's right.

We're doing the responsible thing.

We're social distancing. I'm doing this at home alone. So if you hear a dog barking, that's

Finn. We are still committed to providing you, our listeners, with the content to get you through

this tough, uncertain, sometimes excruciating time. And that is why this episode of Troubled Waters

is our first ever play-at-home edition. It's like one of those things you get, like, as a consolation

...