TRC REMIX: Who Should I Date? with Phylicia Masonheimer
The Refined Collective Podcast
Kat Harris
4.8 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 21 July 2021
⏱️ 63 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Thank you Newsstand Studio at 1 Rockefeller Plaza for providing a place for me to record this episode for y’all! No more Brooklyn closet recording!!!
Welcome to the TRC Remix Series #5. If you’re not sure what this series is click here for more info!
Today’s TRC Remix episode is with Theologian and powerhouse Phylicia Masonheimer. In this conversation she candidly shares how her husband wasn’t her ‘type’ when they met. We move through the question: as a woman should we be looking for a ‘spiritual leader’ and what does that even mean when we say that? And finally she shares the top 3 things to look for in a partner.
The Way They Met
- Phylicia shares how she didn’t see her husband as her type when she met him, but he loved her so well and he loved God--so she decided to give it a shot to see if feelings could develop.
Do I need to be led spiritually by someone else?
- Do we need to be at the same place on our spiritual journey with the person we date and marry?
- The church taught us that we need to be led by men who act as our spiritual leaders, but ‘spiritual leader’ isn’t mentioned anywhere in the Bible.
- Phylicia shares the difference between complementarian views and the egalitarian views within Christianity.
- “We’re after the leader heart… not just somebody who has collected a lot of Bible knowledge.”
Questions to Ask the Guy You’re Getting to Know
- Does he desire God? Does he desire to know God? Does he desire to go deeper?
- Is he dependent on his friends or parents to be spiritual?
- What are his sexual boundaries and standards?
3 Things to Look For in a Partner
- Loves God
- Works hard
- Humility
“If he has those three things, then he can grow, he can change, he can develop + adapt. But it’s really hard to be tied to an unbeliever, a lazy man, or a stubborn man.”
Why you should date someone that share your faith / worldview?
- Phylicia recalls the time she was dating someone who didn’t share her faith. She was unsure if she should move forward, so she asked God for a sign. She received three.
- “You’ve known the truth all along.”
- 2 Corinthians 6:14 — “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.”…with fundamentally different worldviews you’re pulling in different directions—you want to be with someone who is moving forward with you.
- Since this episode went live, I do a deeper dive on the question: should I date / marry a Christian HERE.
Resources
- You can buy her book, Stop Calling Me Beautiful, here.
- Keep up with her at PhyliciaMasonheimer.com or on Instagram at @phyliciamasonheimer.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Refine Collective Podcast. |
| 0:06.4 | I'm your host, Cat Harris, and I'm just so glad you're here. |
| 0:10.6 | This podcast is designed to dig below the surface. |
| 0:14.4 | We're going to talk about everything from life to love and pretty much everything |
| 0:18.8 | in between. |
| 0:20.1 | So go ahead and leave that Superman cape of having it all together at the door because |
| 0:24.6 | life is freaking messy. |
| 0:26.6 | Don't I know it. |
| 0:28.6 | Now, not only are we going to be real, we're going to have some fun too because Lord |
| 0:32.2 | knows I will find any excuse to bring up Beyonce or the latest episode of the Bachelorette. |
| 0:38.1 | So if you're a new friend, welcome. |
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| 0:44.6 | And if you're an old friend, welcome back. |
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| 1:00.0 | Instagram. |
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| 1:02.1 | It's at the Refine Woman. |
| 1:03.9 | Now, let's go ahead and get to it. |
| 1:09.2 | Welcome to the Refine Collective Podcast. |
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