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Leading Saints Podcast

Toxic Perfectionism at Church | An Interview with Justin Dyer

Leading Saints Podcast

Leading Saints

Religion & Spirituality, Christianity

4.91.2K Ratings

🗓️ 29 March 2025

⏱️ 52 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Justin Dyer received BA in Marriage and Family from Brigham Young University and a Master's and Ph.D. in Human Development and Family Studies from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. He also has expertise in statistics. Justin is a professor of religion at BYU, teaching religion and family classes, and focuses his research on religion and mental health. He has published over 70 peer-reviewed studies in scholarly journals.

Justin has served in various Church callings including full-time missionary in Brazil, Primary teacher, early morning Seminary teacher, Young Men leader, and bishop. He currently serves as a ward missionary. Most importantly, Justin has been married for 22 years and has six children whom he loves to inundate with the most recent, intriguing research graphs he has created.


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Highlights
Justin talks about toxic perfectionism, particularly within the context of Latter-day Saints. He shares his research findings, which challenge the common belief that Latter-day Saints are inherently more prone to toxic perfectionism than individuals from other religious backgrounds. He explains that while 12% of Latter-day Saint youth exhibit high levels of toxic perfectionism, this figure is lower than the 20% found among atheists and agnostics, suggesting that toxic perfectionism is a broader human tendency rather than a specific issue tied to religious beliefs.

The conversation delves into the nuances of perfectionism, distinguishing between healthy striving for high standards and the detrimental effects of toxic perfectionism, which can lead to feelings of worthlessness and shame. Justin emphasizes the importance of fostering a secure attachment to God, which can mitigate feelings of toxic perfectionism. He highlights the role of parents and leaders in creating an environment of love and support, rather than shame, to help youth navigate their identities and self-worth. The episode also addresses the challenges faced by LGBTQ youth within religious contexts, advocating for a compassionate approach that maintains the value of religious teachings while providing necessary support. The conversation underscores the significance of identity and the need for leaders and parents to remind youth of their inherent worth as children of God, encouraging them to strive for high standards without the burden of toxic perfectionism.

01:41 - Introduction of Justin Dyer and Research Focus
02:56 - Exploring Toxic Perfectionism
03:41 - Research Intent and Methodology
05:12 - Understanding Toxic Perfectionism
06:48 - Healthy vs. Toxic Perfectionism
09:46 - Impact of Perfectionism on Identity
10:33 - Balancing Standards and Self-Worth
12:06 - The Role of Perfectionism in Religious Context
13:13 - Addressing Youth and Leadership Dynamics
14:03 - The Challenge of Leadership Messaging
16:44 - Data Insights on Toxic Perfectionism
20:06 - The Role of Religion in Mental Health
22:44 - Encouraging a Positive Gospel Experience
24:33 - Parenting and Toxic Perfectionism in Youth
27:01 - The Importance of Love in Parenting
28:51 - The Impact of Parental Relationships on Identity
30:41 - Navigating Adolescence and Identity
32:27 - The Dangers of Silent Suffering
34:13 - Encouraging Healthy Standards in Youth
36:36 - Addressing LGBTQ Dynamics in Religious Context

Transcript

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0:00.0

Have you ever tried to help youth with their mental health? That's a tricky road to travel.

0:06.7

I have to tell you about an inspiring presentation we recorded with a one and only Jody Moore.

0:12.1

Yes, that life coaching Jody Moore. A few years ago, she recorded a fantastic presentation

0:18.0

covering topics like normalizing tough feelings with youth, a more positive

0:22.7

understanding of stress, how to minimize shame, and mastering the skill set of empathy and better

0:28.7

understanding anxiety. I want you to see this presentation as soon as you finish this podcast

0:33.8

episode. You can go to leadingsaints.org slash 14 and this will get you access to the entire video library at no cost for 14 days.

0:42.9

Jody's presentation is in the Mentally Healthy Saints Library,

0:46.3

and you'll be a better leader or parent when you finish it.

0:49.8

Again, go to leadingsaints.org slash 14,

0:52.1

or check out the show notes for the link.

0:58.8

Hey, welcome to the leading saints podcast.

1:01.3

Now, for many of you that are brand new to leading saints, it's important to do know

1:05.4

that leading saints is a nonprofit organization, 501c3, dedicated to helping Latter Day Saints be better prepared to lead and we do that through

1:14.6

content creation. We get so much positive feedback on the podcast, our virtual conferences, the articles on our website.

1:21.8

You definitely got to check it out at leadingsaints.org and on their homepage at leading saints.

1:26.5

You can actually find the top six most

1:28.9

downloaded episodes to the podcast. So if you're new, like the content, want to jump in to some

1:33.8

our most popular episodes. Head there after you listen to this episode.

1:41.2

We are welcoming back Justin Dyer into the studio. Justin's a BYU professor of a professor of religion.

1:48.7

Now, BYU teaches the eternal family courses, but also does phenomenal research with a fantastic team with Sam Hardy and Mike Goodman, who we've had on the podcast before.

1:58.2

And I just love the questions these guys asked, the research

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