It is all over for the Conservatives. They are cooked, toast, finito, routed,

smashed, deceased, perished, pickled, wrecked, kapot. You know that scene in Terminator 2 where

the nuclear bomb goes off and it's all pl, pl, pl, pl, and Sarah Collins clinging onto the fence

as she's incinerated. Yeah well that's so Conservatives' Electoral Prospects.

Now, there were two bi elections this Thursday. The first, I'll discuss, was Midbedfordshire.

That was held by Nandine Dorries, who amongst other things was a former culture secretary,

a former TV panace of mine who got on occasion. And I would argue an inadvertent camp icon.

Anyway, she dragged out of his ironing from her seat because she was so angry that she

sannacked Blockter from getting a period. And I am so here for that level of pettiness,

I can't help but respect it. Anyway, she won that seat in 2019 with a more than 24,500 majority.

Yes, that a Labour took that seat with a 1,192 majority, which has a swing of 20.5 to Labour.

Now, the other was caused by the resignation of Chris Pitchett, who was the former

conservative whip who resigned over sexual misconduct. That's the seat of Tamworth in Staffordshire,

Staffordshire, well, hello. The choice held that seat with a 19.5,000 majority of so

back in 2019, Labour surveyed Edwards overturned that and now has a majority of 1,360.

So that's a swing of 23.9 points to Labour. Let's just hear the moment she was elected.

Now, the toy candidate, Andrew Cooper, was a new happy. And if there's one word,

though, I would really associate with the Conservatives right now. It's dignity. So in that spirit,

when seven Edwards began her victory speech, he rushed off stage to the news fire exit.

Now, let's just be clear here, there is no way the Conservatives can turn this around.

I talked about this on Good Morning Britain on ITV to explain why, but before that clip,

let's listen to the preeminent swathologist. He never pronounced that word. So John Curtis,

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