To Love Yourself, You Have to Tell the TRUTH

Mary’s Cup of Tea: the Self-Love Podcast for Women

Mary Jelkovsky

Self-love, Body-image, Mental Health, Body Image, Relationships, Women's Health, Self Love, Advice For Women, Self Love For Women, Love Yourself, Education, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Self-improvement

4.8 • 721 Ratings

🗓️ 7 August 2025

⏱️ 23 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

You can’t truly love yourself if you’re lying to yourself. And you certainly can’t find peace in a version of you that’s not real. Because when you try to love a version of yourself that isn’t true, it feels empty. It’s like people-pleasing: if you sacrifice authenticity for approval, then who are they really approving of? Not the real you. And the same goes for self-approval. If we dress up a lie and call it self-love, we’re building a facade that will inevitably crumble.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, hello. Welcome to Mary's Cup of Tea, the self-love podcast for women, though all self-lovers are
0:06.7	welcome here. I'm Mary. I write and speak about self-love, and I'm best known for my book,
0:12.6	The Gift of Self-Love, and I also host retreats for women. And this is the podcast that will
0:18.2	inspire you to love yourself. Real quick, before we dive in, I want to make
0:23.0	sure you know about my book, The Gift of Self-Love. It's a workbook to help you build confidence,
0:28.2	recognize your worth, and learn to love who you are. It's available anywhere books are sold.
0:33.1	Thousands of people have it, love it, and have told me that it is greatly benefited their self-love journey,
0:40.6	and I hope it'll do the same for you. And now let's get into the podcast.
0:46.5	Loving yourself means telling the truth. If you aren't honest with yourself, then you literally
0:52.5	cannot practice self-love because there is no
0:55.4	self for you to love. Or rather, it's a fake version of you that you're trying to love. And in the
1:02.8	long run, that'll only lead you to feel emptier and disconnected from yourself, wondering why
1:10.2	you keep having that haunting inner voice that's
1:13.9	telling you that, hmm, something's not right. Sometimes this feeling, this inner voice shows up
1:21.1	in our bodies. Like right now, I'm dealing with really intense chronic lower back pain. And I can't, for the life of me,
1:30.4	it's been over seven months that I've been dealing with this. I can't figure out where it's coming
1:35.6	from. And all the doctors that I visited have said, nothing's like really structurally that
1:41.2	bad with you. And you should have been recovered by now and you shouldn't be
1:45.5	feeling the intense pain that you're in. So now I'm like, oh my goodness, I think it's something
1:51.3	psychosomatic, something emotional, spiritual. And anytime I'm in the space of like, what am I missing?
2:07.6	I come back to the idea of what truth am I resisting?
2:15.5	What am I not admitting to myself right now? And that's a big scary question. Hopefully I can make it a little bit more digestible in this podcast episode. I've
	...

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