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The Morning Stream

TMS 2970: AARP Centerfold

The Morning Stream

Scott Johnson

Comedy

4.71.4K Ratings

🗓️ 26 February 2026

⏱️ 71 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Inbox Zero. AI or Amish, with nothing in-between. The river goes through the zebra. Flowery whatever zone. Because Pepperidge Farm Remembers Cocaine Is Amazing! Impaled by Jackelope. Apple Computer Microbrewery. You Don't See Too Many ZOYs These Days. Final Destination: Longhorn Steakhouse. 80-Year-Olds do all of Democracy. Casayt teppes! Pick up your socks! Let Your Woe Begone. Eat Raw Meat. Putting Out Virtual Fires With Wendi and more on this episode of The Morning Stream.

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Transcript

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0:00.0

Dogs would like cats if cats would just chill a little bit.

0:03.7

We could put all that nastiness behind us forever if the cats would just slow their role.

0:09.2

Regardless of how all that pans out, support the TMS Patreon at patreon.com slash TMS today.

0:15.8

Coming up on the morning's dream in box zero.

0:18.5

AI or Amish.

0:19.7

There's nothing in between.

0:23.3

The river goes through the zebra.y whatever zone because pepperidge farm remembers cocaine is amazing impaled by a jackalope apple computer

0:29.9

microbrewery you don't see too many zoys these days final destination longhorn steakhouse 80 year olds

0:37.1

do all of democracy.

0:39.0

Kasea Teps.

0:41.7

Pick up your socks.

0:43.6

Let your woe begun.

0:45.2

Eat raw meat.

0:47.7

Putting out virtual fires with Wendy and more on this episode of the morning's dream.

0:57.0

The stray bullet struck her right in the stomach. It pierced the skin, but started to slow down as it entered her body fat.

1:02.0

Layer by layer, the fat absorbed more of the bullet's energy, like a cushion.

1:07.0

And by the time it hit deeper tissue, the bullet had lost most of its force, coming to a stop before hitting any organs and saving her life.

1:15.8

That's why you should come to the largest buffet in Annapolis.

1:19.0

We hope you did well, and we look forward to your blessed usherence.

1:23.0

D. M.S. S. S. The morning

1:33.4

Raw meat.

1:35.8

Do you like raw meat?

...

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