because at the beginning is the vitamins of the podcast where you're like, hey, pay me money to keep me going. And hey, here's another way to pay me money. And hey, I'm going to be on this show, which basically pays me money. So, by the way, take the vitamins. And, like, if you're, like, a super fan who doesn't want to hear any of that shit, you just get past the first two or three minutes of the podcast, right? And like, I'm not any good at that.

I can't really do it.

I've been trying to do it lately.

I'm okay. I'm getting better. I'm getting less self-conscious, yada, yada, yada. But like, in person, I know who I am when I travel. I've traveled to many places alone or with somebody else, and I know who I am. I wake up.

I feel great.

I go out. I go someplace. I guess I won't get breakfast anymore since I now have my breakfast on me. So I guess now I'll look forward to lunch for the first meal of the day and it won't be breakfast food. That's cool. That's an adjustment, but that's fine. and like I'll I'll have a good couple of hours, and I'll be a, God, maybe this could be my life.

Like, maybe this could be who I am.

And I'll be all happy in the new place for just, like, I don't know, a couple of hours.

And then, like, I'll just walk past some fucking, I'll walk past a screen or a newspaper stand or something and I'll see a headline. And that's that. And then I'm right back to who I always fucking write at. I have to pull it up and I have to look at and I'll look at it and I'll look at the story. Like, oh, are you fucking kidding me? This is Dick Army's proposal from fucking 92. You don't even know who Dick Army is. You think I'm just making up a name. His name was Dick Army, and he proposed things, and people listened to him. His name was Dick Army, and we had to say it with a straight face, so you have to hear me saying with a straight face, because I had to practice that his name was Dick Army.

And he was really, really important. His name was Senator Dick Army. And that's how he referred to himself. Not Rich Army, not Richard Army, not Senator Army, he'd say, call me Dick

Army. I had to practice that one, call me Dick Army.

I had to practice that one, so you have to hear it.

And so, like, I'll read the news story about, like, Dick Army or anything like that.

And, like, you know, and I'll just be like, now I've got to talk about insurance.

I don't want to talk about insurance for five minutes tonight, but if I don't, there's no way I'm going to be able to read a poem, not have that on the back of my head. I'll be reading the poem, they're like, Eliza, I shall love you forever, ever I shall love thee. And if ever you shall cough, I'll be like, ah, see, cough, cough, ah, okay, so let's talk about the insurance real quick.

And I'll just go fucking off, right? I can't, that's just how it happens. There's like, there's the 10 to 20% chance that I'm going to encounter some love letter where like the guys are like, and if ever you should turn ill, because all romance was written before the year 1900. That's just a well-established fact.

All unicorns, all actual romance, and all magic died in the year 1900.

That's just a fact.

We all know it's true.

And so, like, because there's a decent chance, it'll be the 1800s. There's going to be some references to sickness.

So if I read

something about like universal health care being stalled up by some subcommittee, either I rant

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