This is Why You're Afraid of Being Happy

The Dr. Leaf Show

Dr. Caroline Leaf

Mental Health, Health & Fitness

4.6 • 3.2K Ratings

🗓️ 12 November 2025

⏱️ 22 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Why do we sometimes panic when things finally get better? Why can rest, safety, or even joy register as unpredictable or unsafe? In this episode, I walk you through what happens when a trauma-trained brain reacts to peace like it’s danger—and how your mind can gently redirect that response. You’ll learn what joy-triggered anxiety actually reflects, why the brain loops it so quickly, and how to retrain the pattern in a way that doesn’t rely on guilt or pressure. If you're tired of waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under you, this video is for you. 📘 My new book Help in a Hurry is out now! ✏️ Rewire your mind, reclaim your peace, and save $50 on the new Help in a Hurry course—signed book included at www.helpinahurrycourse.com Inside the book and course, I walk you through: • How to interrupt trauma-trained reactions using the 5-step Neurocycle • Tools for building joy tolerance gradually and intentionally • Why your brain loops protective responses—and how your mind can step in • Real language to redirect thought patterns in the moment 🧠 Explore the Neurocycle app: https://neurocycle.app 📨 Subscribe to Mental Mess Monday: https://drleaf.com/pages/newsletter 🎙️ Listen to all podcast episodes: https://drleaf.com/pages/podcast 🌐 Visit my website: https://www.drleaf.com GET IN TOUCH: 📸 Instagram: / drcarolineleaf 🐦 Twitter: / drcarolineleaf 💻 Facebook: / drcarolineleaf SPONSORS: Nature's Sunshine: Nature's Sunshine is offering 20% off your first order plus free shipping. Go to naturessunshine.com and use the code DRLEAF at checkout. MENO by O Positiv: Get 25% off your first purchase with code DRLEAF at checkout or visit opositiv.com/drleaf Nurture Life: Head to NurtureLife.com/DRLEAF and use code DRLEAF for 55% off your first order PLUS free shipping. DISCLAIMER: This podcast and blog are for educational purposes only and are not intended as medical advice. Please consult with a professional for personalized support. #JoyAfterTrauma #TraumaHealing #DrCarolineLeaf #Neurocycle #HelpInAHurry #MindAndBrain #PostTraumaAnxiety #EmotionalSafety #BrainRewiring #HabitRecovery #MentalHealthTools #PsychologyPodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Have you ever felt anxious when something good finally happens? Like the peace registers is
0:06.5	unpredictable, like your mind's waiting for the next interruption, for the shoe to drop.
0:11.9	I've heard this from so many people. I've got the good news and I burst into tears, or I was
0:18.2	finally on vacation, but I just couldn't settle in. It feels like your body didn't
0:23.6	get the memo, like your mind knows you're safe, but something else is running in the background.
0:28.6	That response, it's a recorded loop that your brain has practiced under pressure. Here's why that
0:35.2	matters. When you've practiced tension long enough, peace doesn't always register as peace.
0:40.7	It registers as unpredictable.
0:42.9	And the moment something becomes unpredictable, your brain will default to the pattern that knows how to run.
0:48.9	That's where the mind has to step in.
0:51.8	Not to erase the response, but to reinterpret it. This is where the philosophy
0:57.8	becomes practical. The brain stores, the mind directs, and in high intensity experiences, trauma,
1:06.1	prolonged pressure, emotional whiplash, your brain is just trying to stabilize the loop.
1:11.7	It's working with what it's been fed or given.
1:14.7	But that's not the final word.
1:16.4	Your mind has the ability to reshape how those cues get processed and put into the brain.
1:22.3	And over time, that reshaping becomes a new pathway.
1:27.3	In this week's episode, we are talking about why joy can feel so unbearable after trauma.
1:33.4	What's happening in your brain, how your mind can direct something different, and how to make peace feel safe again.
1:39.6	One response at a time.
1:42.0	If you've been listening to the show for a while, you know how deeply
1:45.0	connected our gut health is to our mental health. Your gut houses about 80% of your immune
	...

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