This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical

wisdom, and insights from parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening,

and we hope this helps. They're the only ones in there. It seems obvious, but we violate it

pretty much constantly. To some people, their basic definition of. It seems obvious, but we violate it pretty much constantly.

To some people, their basic definition of parenting violates it,

but that doesn't mean that the underlying fact isn't true.

Dr. Becky, just read good insight already if you haven't.

Seriously, I keep recommending it for a reason.

But anyways, she says that she tries to repeat this to her kids as often as possible.

You're the only one in your body, so only you know what you like. She probably repeats it as much for her benefit as theirs, because of course they know what they like.

The problem is that we tend to assume that we know better.

And how could that be true? We're not inside them.

We're not the same as them, as much as they sometimes seem like us. The reason we have to remember that they're the ones inside their body is that it comes down to consent. Do we really need to force them to wear this shirt over that shirt? Do we need to convince them that they like this food or that one? Do we need to tell them what their major should be that actually they'd be happier if they pursued accounting over English? By doing these things, we might be winning the argument, but we're damaging

their ability to understand themselves, to understand their autonomy, and also making them

ironically susceptible to other people or influences, forcing them to do things that we wouldn't

want them to do. Obviously, there are things,

especially early on, where we have to make choices contrary to theirs, such as matters pertaining

to sleep or bathing or health. But so many of the other fights and arguments we get into with

our kids have much lower stakes. As we've said before, knowing better is a corrosive thing,

because it becomes less true over time time and it's hard to turn off

...