There’s No Fairytale Ending w/ Todd Baratz
Almost Adulting with Violet Benson
Violet Benson
4.8 • 4.1K Ratings
🗓️ 11 August 2022
⏱️ 73 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
It can be a hard pill to swallow, but you can’t also become the person you want to be if you’re stuck in the past. There’s no fairytale or storybook ending if you don’t fix what’s within, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone!
Today we welcome sex and relationships therapist, Todd Baratz! Todd has devoted his entire life to wellness as he actively works against all formalities, traditions and diagnosis. Together Violet and Todd discuss the importance of intimacy negotiation in a relationship, identifying self sabotaging behaviors, and how to fill emotional voids. The two also deep dive into the myth of being “relationship ready”. The truth is, there’s no such thing. Relational love leads to self love. Besties, sometimes the real breakup you need is with your old patterns and behaviors.
Contact Todd and find his online courses here: https://www.toddsbaratz.com/
Advertise with Almost Adulting at Gumball.fm
What to Listen For:
- 00:00 Introduction
- 01:02 What it means to start therapy at 10 years old
- 05:03 “I literally just said your partner has fantasies…”
- 08:07 Couple issues tend to come from personal trauma
- 10:17 Our relationships are emotional
- 14:02 Everybody deals with relationships at different pace
- 15:35 Self-sabotaging
- 18:45 Why are we drawn to emotionally unavailable people
- 22:23 How can you tell if someone is emotionally unavailable?
- 23:25 When should you walk away?
- 25:23 Lies that we hear about relationships
- 27:11 It’s normal to sit with your feelings
- 30:03 How do you deal with uncertainty?
- 32:29 The pressure to succeed with relationships
- 35:39 Where’s the line between feeling and thinking?
- 37:56 Stop blaming people about your feelings
- 46:41 Feeling the victim all the time
- 39:38 Why does language matter so much?
- 43:47 Self discovery happens, it’s not a rush
- 46:39 Being the victim constantly
- 50:01 Can you still be in a relationship while still working on yourself
- 52:27 Good habits to make yourself feel better
Connect with Todd on:
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm so sick of people when you're like going through a break up or you're single in the |
| 0:04.2 | loan and you're like, what am I doing wrong? |
| 0:05.8 | And then you talk to couples and they're always like, you know what? |
| 0:09.2 | When I met John, I just knew. |
| 0:11.0 | And you're like, bitch, I've known you for 10 years. |
| 0:13.9 | Every time you met a guy, you're like, he's the one. |
| 0:16.4 | So that's the lie. |
| 0:17.4 | It's a file of Benson. |
| 0:18.4 | Your favorite meme queen in the big city you didn't ask for, but, see you. |
| 0:22.4 | Welcome to almost adult gang. |
| 0:25.4 | Are you ready? |
| 0:31.6 | Hello, my fellow humans. |
| 0:35.6 | And welcome to a brand new episode of almost adulting with me. |
| 0:40.4 | You've exist your host and your best friend, Vila Benson. |
| 0:44.7 | Today we have an awesome episode, episode technically number two of breakups and cheating |
| 0:52.3 | month. |
| 0:53.3 | It's with Todd. |
| 0:54.3 | Before we get started, a few things. |
| 0:56.4 | Number one, it's so funny, but I actually got to hang out with Todd recently after I |
| 1:02.3 | did this interview. |
| 1:03.9 | And the funny thing is that I had this whole idea of who Todd was. |
| 1:08.2 | And I thought he was this very like uptight, spiritual human being and you won't be able |
... |
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