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Hour one of the Von Hesler Doctrine begins right now.

I'm your host, Eric Von Hesler.

Signlight headphones are malfunctioning as we start this show.

Can you believe that?

It's all right. I'm a pro.

Work right through it.

What are you hearing?

Huh? Huh?

They're working. They're working all right right now.

All right. Well, welcome to the show. I'm Eric Von Hessler. I'm not alone.

Of course, I have most of the doctrinares here. Tim Andrews is here.

Autumn Fisher has the week off and vacation. I don't know. Did she go up to the mountains or she go on a cruise? What'd she do? She is on a resort vacation with her mother. A resort vacation with her mother, well-needed. So I hope they're having fun. We're having fun, though, right? I mean, we're here at work. We're having fun. George Clark is here. Jerry Yamamoto, you've heard him speak already. I know. I can't believe I jumped out of turn. No, no. I was addressing you. So it's okay.

Thank goodness. And also, you know, as I get, you know, I'm going from one to the other, who's here, who's not here. I know that the audience is very anxious. Your name comes up at the end. So the big Jared fans are like, I hope he's there.

I hope he's there.

So you alleviated that early by chiming in and letting them know.

They can relax.

Letting them know that I am here.

Their favorite millennial, their favorite functioning alcoholic, Jared Yamamoto, is in fact here.

I am worried about our friend Tim here.

I mean, look at how many ibuprofen pills he's got over here.

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