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These people just make noise and basically waste our time.

Dear members of the media and the public, I welcome you.

Hour one of this week's Friday edition of the Von Hesler Doctrine begins right now.

I'm your host, Eric Von Hesler.

We've got a full house of doctrinares.

Tim Andrews is here.

Autumn Fisher is here.

George Clark is here and Jerry Yamamoto is here.

I have to say a couple things right off the top.

I've been doing some reading in my prep.

And it's a family show, but I just got to say, guys, watch the jelking.

It doesn't work.

I'm giving it a shot?

Yeah, I try to.

You can look it up and you get home.

When it comes to jelking, our commentary will never tell you exactly what it is.

I haven't heard that in forever.

I just read, right before I came, I just read some, I'll call it a junk influencer. That's correct. We have influencers online. Fred Sanford? Not that kind of junk. Oh, a different kind of junk. In your pants, junk. Oh, I see. There's a junk influencer, and I just read a story where he was like, hey, you got to watch out for this jelking. So it's an old term? I assumed it was the first time I ever heard it by life was about 10 minutes ago. No, I heard about it a while. Back in our old show. Oh, okay. I guess if, well, you may have, you know. I'm in early a time. I may not have needed the services involved, possibly. So I wouldn't know as much about it.

Seems painful. Yes, it does. That's why I didn't try it. Well, pain leads to pleasure quite often. That's true. At least, you know, listening to this junk influencer, that's what I hear. So are there dangers associated with doing this? Yes, there are, because... And here's why, apparently. It is, what did the guys say?

It's, because, and here's why, apparently, it is, what did the guys say?

...