4.8 • 12.9K Ratings
🗓️ 4 September 2023
⏱️ 150 minutes
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0:00.0 | I was so unhappy, lonely, isolated, terrified. |
0:19.4 | I got to a point where I couldn't see a future and is something that was so shameful I can't |
0:24.3 | like, you know, talk about it. |
0:26.1 | No amount of guilt will ever change the past. |
0:28.5 | No amount of anxiety can shape the future. |
0:30.9 | I'm not of the belief that had I figured this out, I would have been a better performer. |
0:34.4 | I just think I would have been happier throughout my entire career. |
0:39.8 | We tend to think professional athletes live these perfect, charmed lives. |
0:45.2 | Genetically gifted, they seem to effortlessly conquer physical challenges with confidence, |
0:51.4 | propelled by physics, unattainable by mere mortals. |
0:55.5 | In the outside looking in, Tim Tollifson is one such example. |
1:00.2 | One of the world's most successful ultra runners, Tim has a slew of impressive race victories |
1:05.1 | to his name, accomplishments matched with a winning smile and handsome looks that would |
1:10.8 | lead just about anyone to believe him to be this exemplar of strength and of health. |
1:16.8 | But behind it all, Tim waged this very private two-decade long battle with body dysmorphia |
1:23.5 | and disordered eating that not only compromised his athleticism, but completely debilitated |
1:31.5 | him, producing this never-ending cycle of anxiety, of loneliness, self-hatred, and the inability |
1:40.2 | to even show up for the people he cared about most. |
1:44.0 | Now, while we've become accustomed to addressing food disorders with women and with girls, there |
1:49.6 | is a certain stigma or taboo that persists when it comes to how these conditions, despite |
1:55.9 | their prevalence, afflict men, most of whom suffer in silence, reluctant to even ask |
2:02.8 | for or let alone receive help. |
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