Patagonia has just launched a podcast, Patagonia Stories. In each episode,

host our Chana Rom will explore how we gather knowledge and ask questions about our relationship

to each other in the natural world. Questions like, how are lessons passed down through generations

to help us feel at home? What barriers prevent us from acquiring natural wisdom? How can we adapt

in the face for rapidly changing climate? There's so much more to come. You can find the first season

of Patagonia Stories wherever you get your podcasts.

You're listening to The Derback Dary, a production of Duck Tape Then Beer, with additional support from

Kuat Racks because you love your bike, athletic greens, the daily drink for healthier you,

and kicking horse coffee, wake up and kick ass.

Hey everyone, just a quick note that this episode contains a mention of suicide. Thanks.

Scoot was my dad's nickname. I'm not sure why or where it came from, but I know he had a red,

blue, and white woolen hat with Scoot knit into the front. I know that when he started making

climbing and hang gliding harnesses for his friends, Scoot was the name he used for his company.

From pictures, stories, and a scattering of memories, I know he loved nature and the outdoors.

But I don't really know him because on the 2nd of August, 1993, alone in a field, he took his own life.

That day, my mom faced the impossible task of telling three young children that their dad was gone.

She told us that he died in a hunting accident. Then, she said about the task of being

parent enough for both of them, something she managed with room to spare.

I don't know exactly when, but from a young age, I became suspicious that my dad didn't die in an

accident. I knew the kind of gun he used. I knew he was a careful gun owner. I knew he was alone.

But for nearly 20 years, I didn't talk about it with anyone. That doesn't mean I didn't think about it.

I thought about it a lot, but I was also terrified of being right and terrified of upsetting anyone in my

...