The Shoplifter

Run That Prank

iHeartPodcasts

Comedy, Improv

4.7 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 15 April 2022

⏱️ 9 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Fool #1 is calling an employee accusing her of grand theft. Needless to say this woman goes off!

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This is an IHeart podcast.
0:05.4	Coming up at the top of the hour, right about four minutes after, it's my strawberry letter for today.
0:10.6	The subject, how often should you get a massage?
0:13.9	That's a question.
0:15.1	How often should you get a massage?
0:17.7	All right?
0:18.0	All right.
0:18.5	But right now, the nephew is here with today's prank phone call. What's you got now?
0:22.3	The shoplifter. Let's go, cat dog.
0:27.7	Hello?
0:29.0	Yes, I'm trying to reach a Tanya whitts, please.
0:32.3	Listen to see.
0:33.5	Hi, Tanya. My name is Daniel Mitter. I'm the head of store security here at your job.
0:38.3	Yeah.
0:39.3	Listen, I'm trying to see, I'm going to have to, I know today's your day off. I'm looking at the schedule here. It seems that you don't come back in until Saturday. I'm trying to see if it's possible I can get you to come to the store. There's a bit of a situation I want to discuss with you.
0:58.5	There's about $1,800 worth of merchandise missing from the store.
1:06.0	Yeah. It's about $1,800 worth of merchandise. And we definitely know that this is a in-house situation. This is not someone walking in-shoplifting. This is definitely an in-house situation with employees who have evidently been shoplifting from the store, taking things.
1:17.2	And we want to get down to the roots of the problem.
1:20.5	Okay, so what you're calling me for?
1:22.6	Well, ma'am, it's been brought to my attention that there's a possibility that you may be part of this situation.
1:32.0	I'm in a situation.
1:33.4	I ain't no thief.
	...

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