The Shidduch System May Be Broken. Adina Reich Has a Solution.
Meaningful People
Meaningful Minute
4.8 • 1.9K Ratings
🗓️ 18 October 2025
⏱️ 71 minutes
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Summary
In this heartfelt and eye-opening conversation, veteran shadchan Adina Reich traces the evolution of the shidduch system — from handwritten index cards to WhatsApp chats — and reflects on the hopes, heartbreak, and faith that define it. She opens up about the challenges singles and parents face, the emotional toll on shadchanim, and her groundbreaking new initiative, The Shidduch Lounge, designed to bring back organic, Torah-centered connections. With humor, honesty, and compassion, Adina offers both an insider’s view of the shidduch world and a vision for how it can heal.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | As a shahchun, it's hard to see, it's hard to hear. |
| 0:02.2 | You're seeing this pain, it's raw, you hear the parents. |
| 0:05.0 | They're really, really in pain. |
| 0:06.6 | Put yourself in their shoes, like it's coming from despair. |
| 0:09.6 | I guess the only way a shahdhan could be considered a good shahdheng is not based on results. |
| 0:14.6 | It's based on how they treat the singles along the way. |
| 0:16.9 | I mean, my degree is in marketing, so sometimes marketing goes together with Shidahim. |
| 0:21.5 | When you're trying to get a guest for someone, it's really how you present them, how you sell it. But at the end of the day, siata Shama'a. It's a Shammu, or just a Shaliyah. This is Adina Reich, a longtime Shachan who's been setting people up for over 20 years, but now she's doing something completely different. she found the Shiduk Lounge, a new kind of space where singles actually meet in person, no endless back and forth, just conversation, connection, and a chance to bring humanity back into dating. A girl sets me at our second week, she said, oh, you know, I met a guy here and he told me he'd like to go out and I told him I'd like to go out. |
| 0:54.5 | Like, what do we do now? |
| 0:56.4 | She said, oh, by the way, would you mind sending me his resume? My mother would like to make some calls. And that's great. For sure. You're not cutting that piece out. Make some calls. But the organic interest that starts goes a long way. It's just so natural. It's so natural. There's so many people dating now who once I gave a no and then they met and they said, oh, I want to go out with her. |
| 1:12.7 | That's what I'm talking about. |
| 1:13.9 | A hundred percent that's not. It's so natural. There's so many people dating now who once I gave a no, and then they met, |
| 1:11.3 | and they said, oh, I want to go out with her. That's what I'm talking about. |
| 1:13.7 | A hundred percent that's happening at the Shiddah Lounge, and I think that is so important. |
| 1:17.7 | We've got to get away from the papers and the pictures that are just not effective, and it's making |
| 1:23.3 | the crisis worse. Do you know when the entire Shiddah system like began? |
| 1:30.3 | Like the entire thing. |
| 1:32.3 | When did it become the way it is? |
| 1:34.3 | That's a great question. |
| 1:36.3 | I'm just going to go back to the way when I was dating. |
| 1:38.3 | Okay, 19 years old, back from seminary, my mom got phone calls. |
| 1:43.3 | Shad Khanam would make a phone call, actually give over |
... |
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