Hey there, it's Nick.

As you probably already know, back in April, we joined Luminary, a new listener-supported

podcast network. We've been releasing brand new episodes over on the Luminary app every

two weeks, but it was important to us that our regular secrets episode was made available

to everyone, whether or not they're a Luminary member. So please enjoy volume 4 of the secrets

hotline. And to listen to more brand new exclusive episodes of Lovin' Radio, go to luminary.link-slash-love.

You'll also get access to loads of other exclusive shows, including a brand new one called

Here to Slay featuring Roxanne Gay and my friend Tressie McMillan Cautum, who I still like,

despite the fact she still hasn't returned my meet through mom and her from last summer.

Your first month is free when you use the website luminary.link-slash-love. Thanks.

My parents got divorced when I was really young and I used to go there with my dad on the weekend.

I can't just girlfriend, my sister and I hated. She was always like getting the fight with people

and she yelled at us, we're like weird little things, like we were eating our cereal

two loud in the morning and she had this really demean way of talking to my sister and I,

like we were babies and we really didn't like her. My dad used to be going a lot and I just

thought this habit of snooping around through his room when he'd leave. And in his top dresser drawer,

I found there was a picture he had of the girlfriend and she was leaning over the bathtub and she was naked.

And so whenever he'd leave, I'd go into his room and I'd look at this picture.

And one day when he was gone, I snuck into his room to look at the picture and in the drawer there was a video tape.

So I put it in the VCR and it was him and the girlfriend having sex like everything.

And of course I knew I shouldn't be watching that but I couldn't stop and I kept rewinding there.

I could get in the car and then go back to the car and I couldn't.

...