This show may contain words that would offend the sensibility of certain habituaries of monasteries.

It's Thursday June 20th, 2019, from Slated to the Gist I, Mike Pasca,

and the news watch never stops.

We have new details of a strange new development in the field of children's heads.

A study of 1,200 people conducted by researchers at the University of the Sunshine Coast

found 41% of participants aged between 18 and 30 had developed a bony lump on the back of their

skull. We suspect that the reason for this bond's performance is because they carried their head

forward, but not just carrying their head forward. They carried their head forward for a long period

of time. Now what's much concerning about the findings is the horn-like spurs typically

don't present until far later in adulthood. It is unclear why that would be the most disturbing

and also unclear why an Australian university would name itself after a casino, but there you have it,

teens. Oh those teens, those crazy teens, what are they getting up to next?

The answer is they're growing horns. We now have a youth so afflicted.

He has to be called Alex and that his voice be disguised. Alex, how are you adopting to your life

with horns? Oh my god guys, you swore you disguised his voice, Alex. I am so sorry. I hope being

identified like that doesn't cause you too much difficulty in school. Yeah, I know kids can be cruel.

So these are in horns in the musical sense. They're not horns in the calumny against the

Jews sense. They're not horns in the Shakespearean sense of being a cuckold. They're not horns in

the animal sense. Kids aren't getting horny in the sense that you know kids are always horny

and we all know how kids get horny. They reach Shakespearean descriptions of cuckoldery. No,

if anything, these are tiny fragments of spurs. They're not spurs in the opposite of a loop-road

sense. They're not spurs in the cowboy boot sense and they're not spurs in the San Antonio sense.

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