meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The Science of Opening Up: The Hidden Cost of Under Sharing | Dr. Leslie John - EP 737

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

John R. Miles

Mental Health, Alternative Health, Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.7779 Ratings

🗓️ 5 March 2026

⏱️ 60 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Why do we feel a "disclosure hangover" the moment we reveal something real, yet feel a persistent sense of loneliness when we stay silent?Today, we are diving into the complex psychology of human connection with one of the world's leading experts on the science of secrets and sharing. Joining me is Harvard Business School professor and author Dr. Leslie John to discuss her groundbreaking new book, "Revealing."In this conversation, we challenge the conventional wisdom that "less is more." Leslie argues that while we are hyper-aware of the risks of oversharing (TMI), we are almost entirely blind to the devastating costs of under-sharing (TLI—Too Little Information). We explore why silence is not neutral and how the fear of vulnerability is actually holding us back from the trust, influence, and well-being we crave.We move from the research labs of Harvard to the internal "release valves" of our own emotions. Leslie reveals why your "disclosure reflex" might be miscalibrated and how "revealing wisely" can supercharge your career, deepen your most important relationships, and even improve your physical health.If you’ve ever held back your truest self out of fear of judgment, this episode provides the scientific compass to help you navigate the social risks of being real.Passion Struck is the #1 alternative health and personal growth podcast dedicated to human flourishing and the science of mattering. It is ranked #1 on FeedSpot’s list of the Top Passion Podcasts on the Web and is consistently recognized among the world's top business and mindset podcasts.Check the full show notes here: https://passionstruck.com/leslie-john-the-science-of-opening-up-tli/Download a Free Companion Reflection Guide: https://www.theignitedlife.net/p/the-hidden-cost-of-silence-leslie-johnConnect with John (keynotes, books, podcast): https://linktr.ee/John_R_MilesGet the book Revealing: The Science and Power of Opening Up: https://www.lesliekjohn.com/bookIn This Episode, You Will Learn:
  • The TLI (Too Little Information) Trap: Why the opportunities you miss by staying silent are far more damaging than the occasional awkwardness of saying too much.
  • The Disclosure Hangover: Understanding the psychological sting we feel after being vulnerable and why it’s often a false signal of social danger.
  • The Body’s Release Valve: Why sharing your feelings is a highly credible form of information that reduces physiological stress and breaks through stagnant communication.
  • The Gender Gap in Vulnerability: Insights from Leslie’s research on how boys and girls process emotion differently as early as kindergarten, and what it means for us as adults.
  • The Power of "Going First": How leaders can use metered vulnerability to build psychological safety and increase team motivation.
Support the Movement Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it. https://StartMattering.comDisclaimer The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment from a licensed physician, therapist, or other qualified professional.

Connect with John

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Coming up next on Passionstruck.

0:02.1

We want to feel known for who we are and we want to not be so alone.

0:06.3

And what's interesting, the corporate world or academia, buttoned up academia,

0:12.0

I started noticing like in these meetings, nobody is sharing their actual feelings about this.

0:19.4

Like we're sharing our thoughts.

0:20.7

We're kind of dancing around.

0:22.0

And I just realized how pervasive this is, the holding back. I'm not saying we should reveal everything

0:27.8

all the time, but I think that most of us stand to benefit tremendously from revealing a little bit

0:35.4

more, a lot of the time. Welcome to Passionstruck. I'm your host,

0:39.3

John Miles. This is the show where we explore the art of human flourishing and what it truly

0:45.1

means to live like it matters. Each week, I sit down with change makers, creators, scientists,

0:50.7

and everyday heroes to decode the human experience and uncover the tools that help

0:55.7

us lead with meaning heal what hurts and pursue the fullest expression of who we're capable

1:01.1

of becoming. Whether you're designing your future, developing as a leader, or seeking deeper

1:05.9

alignment in your life, this show is your invitation to grow with purpose and act with intention. Because the

1:12.6

secret to a life of deep purpose, connection, and impact is choosing to live like you matter.

1:24.7

Hey friends, welcome back to episode 737 of Passionstruck.

1:30.2

Before we dive in, I want to take a moment to thank you.

1:34.2

This past week, I released my new children's book, You Matter Luma, and the response has been overwhelming.

1:41.2

I am so grateful for your support, your messages, and the way that you've

1:46.3

helped bring this book into the world. It means more than I can fully express. And that moment

1:51.8

connects directly to what we've been exploring here over the past month, because at its core,

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from John R. Miles, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of John R. Miles and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.