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Science Quickly

The Science of a Convincing Sorry

Science Quickly

Scientific American

Science

4.31.4K Ratings

🗓️ 22 October 2025

⏱️ 11 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What makes an apology sound sincere? Psychologist Shiri Lev-Ari joins host Rachel Feltman to explore how the effort we put into our words—especially through longer, easier-to-understand language—can signal genuine remorse. New research reveals that even subtle linguistic choices shape how apologies are received and judged. Recommended Reading “Sorries Seem to Have the Harder Words,” by Shiri Lev-Ari, in British Journal of Psychology, Vol. 116; published online May 7, 2025 E-mail us at [email protected] if you have any questions, comments or ideas for stories we should cover! Discover something new every day: subscribe to Scientific American and sign up for Today in Science, our daily newsletter. Science Quickly is produced by Rachel Feltman, Fonda Mwangi and Jeff DelViscio. This episode was edited by Alex Sugiura. Shayna Posses and Aaron Shattuck fact-check the show. The theme music was composed by Dominic Smith. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hi, this is Ava from Vanta.

0:02.0

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and I'm not to say that because I work here. Get started today at banta.com.

0:30.2

Thank you. For scientific American science quickly, I'm Rachel Feldman.

0:51.6

We've all heard apologies that ring hollow and others that sound genuine, but what makes

0:57.5

the difference? New research suggests that the words we choose when we apologize can signal

1:02.6

how much effort we're putting into making amends, and that perceived effort has a big impact.

1:09.0

Here to explain what makes an apology sound authentic is

1:12.4

Shiri Levary, an associate professor in psychology at Royal Holloway University of London.

1:19.1

Thank you so much for coming on to chat today. Thank you for inviting me.

1:23.2

So you recently authored a paper about something that I think many of our listeners think a lot about, especially in the age of the internet, the idea of apologies and what makes one sound genuine.

1:37.5

Could you tell me a little bit about your research background and kind of how you came to this question?

1:42.6

Yeah, so I'm a researcher of language, but I'm particularly interested in language when

1:46.8

it has a social aspect.

1:48.4

So to see how it helps in social functions and influenced by social information.

1:54.0

And I came to apologies because I find apologies quite interesting and bizarre.

1:58.9

There's something that is called cheap talk because anyone can

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