The Rules of Attraction and the Psychology of Romance

Plain English with Derek Thompson

The Ringer

News Commentary, News

4.8 • 1.8K Ratings

🗓️ 20 May 2025

⏱️ 62 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Psychology is hard, even when you’re just trying to understand what’s going on with one impossibly complex person. Romance psychology is particularly hard because you’re trying to understand what’s going on between two impossibly complex people. Eli Finkel is a professor of psychology at Northwestern University. Paul Eastwick is a professor at the University of California, Davis. Both are experts on the psychology of attraction, dating, and romance and hosts of the Love Factually podcast. Today, Derek asks: Does anybody actually have "a type"? Are we any good at predicting the sort of people we’ll fall in love with? Has online dating caused people to over-filter for attraction, even though initial attraction doesn't determine long-term compatibility? How do modern, affluent folks' incredibly high expectations of marriage affect satisfaction in long-term relationships? If you have questions, observations, or ideas for future episodes, email us at [email protected]. Host: Derek Thompson Guests: Eli Finkel and Paul Eastwick Producer: Devon Baroldi Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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1:13.6	Today, the psychology of romance.
1:17.6	In the last few months, a story I've been paying a lot of attention to
1:22.6	is the decline of dating among young people.
1:25.6	Coupling rates among 20-somethings are falling.
1:30.0	In the first 20 years of this century, dating app usage exploded,
1:33.6	replacing almost every other way of meeting a boyfriend or girlfriend.
1:37.4	But today, online dating is clearly in decline.
	...

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