The Reason You’re Attracted to Toxic People—And How to Break the Pattern for Good | Dr. Laura Berman (Fan Fav)

Women of Impact

Impact Theory

Education, Society & Culture, Mental Health, Relationships, Health & Fitness

4.7 • 657 Ratings

🗓️ 17 June 2025

⏱️ 68 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

This is a Fan Fav episode. On this episode, I’m joined by renowned relationship and sex expert, Dr. Laura Berman, to get to the heart of what drives attraction, love, and desire. Dr. Laura sheds light on why those first-date butterflies may actually be your body’s warning signal—and how our old wounds and subconscious patterns sneak into our relationships. We go deep on navigating chemistry, uncovering our personal love maps, recognizing when trauma is running the show, and rewriting the scripts that keep us stuck. Dr. Laura brings her signature warmth, science-backed wisdom, and practical tools for building emotional and physical intimacy—from healing childhood wounds, to manifesting the partnership and feelings you truly desire, to reigniting passion in long-term love. Whether you’re just starting to date again or struggling inside a decades-long marriage, this conversation is packed with aha moments you won’t want to miss. SHOWNOTES The truth about “love at first sight” vs. “lust at first sight”—and why butterflies signal something deeper [00:02:03] How to tell the difference between chemistry, anxiety, and real connection Why we keep repeating unhealthy patterns—and how to break free from “repetition compulsion” [00:06:43] Practical tools for tuning into your body and listening to its wisdom on dates The basement of shame: How unhealed childhood wounds shape our relationships and attachment styles How to “invite your wounds to tea”—embracing self-compassion to heal past trauma [00:22:11] Manifesting love: Why how you want to feel matters more than ticking off boxes The sex/romance stalemate: Breaking down gender differences in intimacy and how to bridge the gap [00:48:35] Reclaiming your sexuality—why self-stimulation is key for women’s pleasure and empowerment Scheduling sex, stoking connection, and creating lasting intimacy in long-term relationships FOLLOW DR. LAURA BERMAN:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drlauraberman/Website: https://drlauraberman.com/Podcast: The Language of Love—available on your favorite podcast platformsYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@drlaurabermanTwitter: https://twitter.com/drlauraberman CHECK OUT OUR SPONSORS Vital Proteins: Get 20% off by going to https://www.vitalproteins.com and entering promo code WOI at check out. BIOptimizers: Head to https://bioptimizers.com/impact and use code IMPACT for 10% off. OneSkin: Get 15% off with code LISA at https://oneskin.co Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://shopify.com/lisa Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.
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0:53.3	We fall in lust at first sight. We don't fall in love at first sight. Because butterflies,
1:00.2	the kind that you're talking about, is actually the body's warning signal.
1:08.8	Dr. Laura Berman, welcome to the show.
1:11.6	Thank you. I'm so excited to be with you.
1:13.6	I am so amped about today and I want to start with someone is going on a date.
1:19.6	And maybe it's like the first date but they're like feeling the feels and they meet them and they feel the butterflies and they're like, oh my God, it feels
1:28.3	like I've known this person for my entire life. You say run. I say run. I know. Isn't that crazy?
1:35.8	Because butterflies, the kind that you're talking about, is actually the body's warning signal.
1:43.2	And more often than not, when we feel like we've known someone in that way,
1:47.0	I met him and it feels like I'm, he feels so familiar to me,
1:51.0	or she feels like I've known her my whole life, yeah,
	...

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