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Hi Steve.

Hi.

So Steve, do you feel in your current life or have you felt in your adult life let us say

that you have carried some of the wounds from your childhood into it or you recognize a pattern?

That's something that you've had since childhood and haven't ever been able to change or at least entirely lose?

Yeah, oh yeah.

I've always had an incredible need for sort of intensity and reassurance and neediness.

And for a long time had no clear idea of why I was sending that out into the world, needing from friends initially and then later in life from romantic interest, a certain kind of intensity.

And it took me many years to figure out that I think what was going on is that as I've constructed my history, you know, my twin brother was more independent than me.

He moved off into the world before me and I never really got over it.

It was kind of the central, unrequited love of my early childhood.

And I kept reenacting it, you know.

When I was a kid, my mom tells the story.

We would lie in the crib and Mike would bonk his head bonk on the crib and I would bonk.

And he would go bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk and I would hit my head bonk, bonk, bonk.

I mean, I think it's at a level that's so deeply embedded in me that I just naturally expect it from the person who I choose to be my twin.

And I have all these ideas about how close we're going to be and it sends them screaming in the other direction, which in a sense is what I think happened.

I think deep down with my twin brother, but I experienced it as I've lost him and I keep losing him again and again and again.

It's really connected to what we're going to talk about today because most of these letters are about, you know, those childhood wounds or those patterns that were inflicted in a sort of family system.

Right.

And the same question of how do we evolve into the people we've grown into being as adults?

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