The News Quiz - Friday 9th October 2020

Friday Night Comedy from BBC Radio 4

BBC

Comedy

4.2 • 13.3K Ratings

🗓️ 9 October 2020

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

A satirical review of the week's news with Andy Zaltzman and guests Mark Steel, Lloyd Langford, Helen Lewis and Felicity Ward. This week the Government's battle with Microsoft Excel, Donald Trump's battle with Covid-19 and Arsenal FC's battle with a dinosaur. Written by Andy Zaltzman with additional material from Max Davis, Charlie Dinkin, Alice Fraser, Robin Morgan and Mo Omar. Producer: Richard Morris A BBC Studios Production

Transcript

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0:00.0	BBC Sounds, Music, Radio, Podcasts.
0:05.0	Hello, I am Andy Zoltzman, winner of the 2020 Nobel Prize for Lying.
0:10.7	I have with me a bag of news come let a strap in a chair shine a torch in its face and quiz it.
0:16.3	Welcome to the News Quiz.
0:23.1	That is our live online audience and this is the news quiz,
0:26.6	a proven cure for all known diseases.
0:29.1	You want proof?
0:30.1	Me, I'm still here and I've been hosting this show for six weeks now,
0:33.4	by comparison, Mozart, never listen to the news quiz, dead.
0:37.8	Proof, 2020 star.
0:40.8	This week we have two teams for your delectation.
0:43.5	We have team Excel spreadsheet versus team,
0:46.2	I'll just count it on your fingers.
0:48.5	Firstly, on team spreadsheet,
0:51.3	we have Felicity Ward and Mark Steele.
0:57.6	And on team fingers, Helen Lewis and Lloyd Langford.
1:07.6	And here is our first question,
1:10.6	it's a question for team spreadsheet for Felicity and Mark.
1:13.6	At this week's virtual Tory party conference,
1:16.6	what did Boris Johnson promise would happen within ten years?
1:21.6	Did he promise that we'd all be dead?
1:25.6	But thankfully he can't follow through on any of his promises.
	...

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