The News Quiz: Ep5. Less Flags, More Bunting

Friday Night Comedy from BBC Radio 4

BBC

Comedy

4.2 • 13.3K Ratings

🗓️ 10 October 2025

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

At this week's Labour Conference, Kier Starmer warned that Britain faces a 'fork in the road'. Helping Andy Zaltzman decide which way to turn are Ian Smith, Celya AB, Hugo Rifkind and Zoe Lyons.

Written by Andy Zaltzman.

With additional material by: Cody Dahler, Eve Delaney and John Tothill Producer: Georgia Keating and James Robinson Executive Producer: Pete Strauss Production Coordinator: Jodie Charman Sound Editor: Marc Willcox

A BBC Studios Production for Radio 4.

Transcript

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0:00.0	BBC Sounds, Music, radio, podcasts.
0:07.2	He scored goals, lifted trophies and broken records along the way.
0:11.4	And now he's got a podcast.
0:13.2	Welcome to the Wayne Rooney show.
0:15.0	Wayne Rooney, Kay Kerrude and me, Kelly Summers, break down the biggest stories in the
0:19.3	Premier League and beyond.
0:20.7	Plus, we'll hear the funniest and most outrageous stories from Wayne's career.
0:24.8	I've never seen the manager go with someone like he did.
0:27.8	There's no way he could have played for Man United ever again.
0:30.2	The Wayne Rooney Show.
0:31.3	It's what everybody's talking about.
0:33.4	Watch your night player. Listen on BBC Sounds.
0:39.2	Hello, I'm Andy Zaltzman.
0:41.4	Don't tell anyone, but I'm in a secret laboratory
0:43.5	trying to find a way of Frankensteining my collection
0:46.0	of 25 million unusable surgical gowns
0:49.4	into a giant magic pot of gold
0:51.8	that then mysteriously disappears into thin air. I've heard on good authority
0:56.0	that it can be done. Let's give it a go.
1:03.0	Oh, disappointing.
1:08.5	I appear to have turned them into an orchestra
1:10.3	of miniature dolphins.
	...

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