We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick.

We are receiving this message.

We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick. We speak to you from our present, which we can only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.

Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this

monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.

So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology to decrypt our transmissions,

this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule.

This is the omnibus. Oh, You have accessed entry 746. I.S. 2903.

Certificate number 31247, the Mafficking Cadet Corps.

On my honor, I will do my best to do my duty to God in my country

and to obey the Scout law to help other people at all times to keep

myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight. We should explain to future lava lizards living in the wilderness, struggling for survival in the rubble of our civilization.

Lava wilderness.

Living in abandoned radio shacks.

We should explain that people used to do that for fun.

People live in the rubble of abandoned radio shack yeah sure I guess they were

called tweakers oh yeah no people would just go out into the wilderness for fun.

This is maybe the first time in history.

When do you think the first people camped for fun?

Victorians?

...