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The Daily Motivation

The Hidden Cost of Being Right & The Power of Taking Less Offense| Dr. Rangan Chatterjee EP 859

The Daily Motivation

Lewis Howes

Education, Self-improvement

4.8893 Ratings

🗓️ 13 January 2025

⏱️ 8 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

"Nothing is inherently offensive. Something happens. Someone shares something. If something was inherently offensive, every single person would get offended. The fact that every single person is not getting offended means it's not that thing that is offensive. It's something within you that's being activated by that external event." - Dr. Rangan Chatterjee In this profound conversation, Dr. Rangan Chatterjee delves into the psychological prison of holding grudges and constantly taking offense. Through personal stories and professional insights, he reveals how society often validates and rewards us for holding onto grievances, while rarely acknowledging the hidden costs to our physical and emotional well-being. Dr. Chatterjee shares his own journey of navigating public controversy during the George Floyd protests, using this experience to illustrate how our need to be right can trap us in cycles of stress and emotional turmoil. The discussion expands into a deeper exploration of how our inner world directly impacts our physical health. Dr. Chatterjee challenges conventional thinking about offense-taking, explaining that in a world of eight billion people, expecting everyone to share our views is not only unrealistic but potentially harmful to our well-being. Through examples from his medical practice and personal life, including his marriage, he demonstrates how letting go of the need to be right can transform our relationships and overall health, offering a compelling case for choosing happiness over righteousness.

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hi, my name is Lewis Howes and welcome to the Daily Motivation Show.

0:12.7

I think you're a prisoner of the past when you don't forgive. And there's, there's a reward for that as well.

0:21.6

Like you get to be righteous, you get to be justice, you get to be right and them wrong, you get to be, you get validation from people having sympathy for you and understanding and understanding how something is not okay and that was horrible what that person did,

0:38.3

and all these different things.

0:40.1

You get rewards.

0:44.0

But I just feel like the reward of forgiveness and setting yourself free

0:45.8

is far greater than any other reward you could get

0:48.6

by holding your grudge.

0:50.0

Exactly.

0:50.9

And holding your grudge and being angry at someone or an event or the government or the

0:57.0

world or the weather, whatever, for ruining something in your life or hurting something

1:03.1

in your life or causing a disruption in your life.

1:05.9

And however drastic or small might be holding a grudge onto that.

1:11.2

That's a cost.

1:12.6

There's a big cost.

1:13.5

There's a big price you'll pay.

1:15.0

There's a big price you'll pay.

1:16.4

But you're validated in society for holding it.

1:19.1

As you say, like if you hold on and you go, yeah, they shouldn't have posted that post.

1:22.7

They're wrong.

1:23.9

Your friends will often support you.

1:26.1

Yeah, they shouldn't have done it, but what we don't, and I used to be that person, so I'm not judging.

...

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