The Four Horseman of the Relational Apocalypse Part 3: Defensiveness
You Need Therapy
iHeartPodcasts
2.4 • 589 Ratings
🗓️ 3 April 2023
⏱️ 27 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Dr. John Gottman discovered four negative behaviors, or “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse,” that spell disaster for any relationship, and with them learned how to predict the failure or success of a relationship with a 90% accuracy rate. This week is the third installment of a 4 part series where we dive into each of the horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, & Stonewalling. We are digging into defensiveness today… and it’s pretty safe to say— we’ve all been defensive a time or two. This week you will learn what being defensive sounds like, what it does, and what the antidote to this toxic communication technique is!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is an IHeart podcast. |
| 0:05.1 | Michael Lewis here. |
| 0:06.8 | My bestselling book, The Big Short, tells the story of the buildup and burst of the U.S. |
| 0:12.1 | housing market back in 2008. |
| 0:14.8 | A decade ago, the Big Short was made into an Academy Award-winning movie. |
| 0:18.7 | Now I'm bringing it to you for the first time as an audiobook narrated |
| 0:22.7 | by yours truly. The Big Short Story, |
| 0:25.5 | what it means to bet against the market, |
| 0:27.5 | and who really pays for an unchecked financial system, |
| 0:30.6 | is as relevant today as it's ever been. |
| 0:33.2 | Get the Big Short now at Pushkin.fm. |
| 0:35.5 | slash audiobooks, or wherever audiobooks are sold. |
| 0:38.9 | I started to realize that not being an expert isn't a liability. It's a real gift. |
| 0:56.3 | If we don't know something about ourselves at this point in our life, it's probably because it's uncomfortable to know. |
| 1:02.1 | If you can die before you die, then you can really live. There's a wisdom at death's door. |
| 1:09.4 | I thought I was insane. |
| 1:11.1 | Yeah. |
| 1:13.7 | And I didn't know what to do because there was no internet. |
| 1:15.0 | I don't know. |
| 1:19.4 | Man, I'm like, I feel like everything is hard. |
| 1:21.3 | Hey, y'all. |
| 1:22.1 | My name is Kat. |
... |
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