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Hello and welcome to the price of football, the podcast that follows the ever-dwindling money behind the Abu Dhabi waterfall game.

You'll be glad to know that my birthday hangover has gone and the man you're about to hear, of course, has never had a hangover.

Mind you, I've never had special cuddles from a girl in Moscow wearing a Barcelona shirt, so you know.

Swings and roundabouts and it's curious. This is of course Curum of Guarab, a professor of football finance and Liverpool University.

Fresh from Norwegian television?

That's right, that was a strange one. My Norwegian hasn't improved as a result of the interview, but I nodded convincingly when they were talking in the local language.

Yes, I once filmed with some Liverpool fans from Oslo. We flew from Oslo to Liverpool.

I've never seen men more drunk in my life. They were astonishing. And we arranged to meet them before the game the next day, and this particular pub.

I went in the end of the bouncer went, if you're looking for the Norwegians, they're bad.

I said, mate, they only got here at midnight last night. They said they did enough damage in two hours. And after the game, this is still my favourite thing.

They were lovely. And after the game, I met up with one of them. And I said, where's the other one? He said, oh, he gets so drunk that the only way you can remember the game is by buying a shirt afterwards.

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