meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

The Closet of Inauthenticity (Jessi Hempel)

Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

Elise Loehnen

Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Self-improvement, Education

4.8900 Ratings

🗓️ 17 November 2022

⏱️ 46 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

“My childhood was a childhood in the closet. I had some good things. I had some bad things, like living in the closet is, you know, not always terrible. It's simply not the greatest expression of, of who we have the capacity to become, I think. Um, but for my parents, you know, as my father went along in my childhood, he became more and more withdrawn and kept trying to do the right thing, was closeted even to himself. This was a secret he was keeping even from himself for most of my childhood. But it made him kind of a lousy partner. Right. My mother's experience was just a very, very lonely experience. Her life looked on the outside exactly like it was supposed to look, we lived in a nice community. She was married to a lawyer, or, you know, we looked great on a Christmas card, but it felt cavernous, just vacant and left with so much time on her own. Um, she really struggled not to let her memory present her with things to work on. And that led her to be very depressed throughout my childhood.” So says Jessi Hempel, a long-time media and technology journalist, an award-winning host of the podcast, Hello Monday, and author of the new memoir, The Family Outing. Her book is a profound telling of family dynamics, offering lessons on accepting one's truest self. Specifically, it’s the story of a family who comes out of the closet to embrace their queer identities. Even Jessi’s mother, who is straight, lives in a type of closet, Jessi explains, as she nearly became the victim of a serial killer as a teenager—this unconfronted trauma affects her entire family’s life. In our conversation, Jessi shares her journey to emphasize the detrimental side-effects of shame and the non-linear path to liberation. Our conversation explores the value of authenticity and navigating parts of ourselves we have not yet learned to face. She believes that when we“step into ourselves,” culture has the capacity to shift, allowing us all to live more gracefully. Okay, let’s get to our conversation.  MORE FROM JESSI HEMPEL: The Family Outing Jessi’s podcast, Hello Monday Follow Jessi on LinkedIn and Instagram To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hi, it's Elise Loonen host of Pulling the Thread. Today's guest is the wonderful Jesse Hempel,

0:06.7

author of the powerful new memoir, The Family Outing. Hi, friends, throughout this holiday season,

0:12.6

you will find me right here per normal. We will keep publishing new episodes every week,

0:19.5

and a few solos thrown in as well. So when you just

0:24.1

need to escape from the business of the holiday shuffle or take a break from mom or dad or who

0:29.4

knows who, we'll be here as we always are. Hi, it's Elise Lunan, host of Pulling the Thread. I'm an author, podcast host and parent who built a long career in media. I grew up in a state of perpetual curiosity, investigating the world and asking

0:56.2

a lot of questions. In this show, I chat with culture defining leaders, thinkers, and experts

1:02.2

about this rare moment that we find ourselves in and how to think about our own lives and experiences

1:07.5

within a larger social and spiritual construct.

1:11.6

My childhood was a childhood in the closet.

1:15.6

It had some good things, had some bad things.

1:17.6

Living in the closet is not always terrible.

1:22.6

It's simply not the greatest expression of who we have the capacity to become, I think. For my parents,

1:29.9

you know, as my father went along in my childhood, he became more and more withdrawn and kept

1:34.7

trying to do the right thing, was closeted even to himself. This was a secret he was keeping

1:38.3

even from himself for most of my childhood. But it made him kind of a lousy partner, right? My mother's experience was just

1:47.0

a very, very lonely experience. Her life looked on the outside exactly like it was supposed to look.

1:52.4

We lived in a nice community. She was married to a lawyer. You know, we looked great on a Christmas

1:57.5

card, but it felt cavernous, vacant.

2:02.6

And left with so much time on her own, she really struggled not to let her memory present her with things to work on.

2:10.6

And that led her to be very depressed throughout my childhood.

2:14.6

So says Jesse Humple, a longtime media and technology journalist, an award-winning

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Elise Loehnen, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Elise Loehnen and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.