4.3 • 17.3K Ratings
🗓️ 13 February 2018
⏱️ 84 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Chris D'Elia seduces Brendan and Bryan to join his cult and the guys talk cult do's and dont's, hedonism, Chris's extremely brighter future and razor thin loss to Theo Von for guest of the year, Instagram funny vs real funny, pranking openers, vengeful lions, giant boars and much more.
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0:00.0 | Uh, uh, Brennan. Tomorrow. I'm at the 10 p.m. Prove Thursday Friday Saturday. I'm at stand-up live in Phoenix. I know you next weekend, next week, bro. Friday Saturday, |
0:13.5 | Lohoya comedy store. Great room. Any other brain bus. Great room. |
0:18.1 | I'm at Florida then to the month to be. I'll let me some sun, love Florida, love orange juice, and I love some fucking |
0:23.8 | alligators. So guess what? Yeah. Florida. I decided to come on out there. I'm in Tampa Bay, Palm Beach, |
0:30.2 | in Orlando, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Orlando, Sunday. All tickets are almost sold out. pfakk.com. |
0:37.6 | God bless you. And will you be, um, optimized, Brennan? Will you be optimized? You're going to be |
0:45.2 | fueled up. Dude, I, uh, I'm a, I'm a alpha brain drug. I shove them in my ass. Well, it's a good way |
0:52.4 | to absorb it, but I don't reckon I can't get enough of it. And you know, I found out we're not |
0:56.1 | illegal. So it makes no sense. I keep doing that. I know. And now I'm just obsessed with shoving |
1:00.0 | them in my butt. So do you think that maybe you're into having things in your butt that are? No, |
1:04.8 | I just think I'm so panicked about running out of alpha brain that I keep doing that. It doesn't |
1:09.6 | make sense. You're absorbing it through your anal lining. No, I put the whole tube in there. All |
1:13.6 | right. Well, man, I don't know, bro. That's so weird because for the rest of you, just ingested |
1:19.6 | orally, the alpha brain, um, uh, it has been shown to improve memory. You know, I heard |
1:24.6 | Elon Musk can't even get a sentence out if you don't have alpha brain. I don't know if that's true, |
1:30.6 | but I've heard that, but I do know that it does, uh, make you folk apparent, it includes, |
1:35.2 | I mean, uh, uh, helps with alpha flow or something. Everything. Yeah. I don't know what alpha flow is. |
1:40.4 | It sounds like made that up. Probably, however, I heard the white house hides alpha brain from Trump. |
1:46.7 | They do. They literally don't want him to be able to use this stuff. That's how scared it is. |
1:50.4 | I know. What could do for you guys out there? I don't know endless possibilities, |
1:54.0 | but I think it's a 10% cloned Einstein's brain and then they freeze right then they powder it |
1:59.8 | and then they put it in capsules. Correct. I think that's what is that with alpha brain? I think so. |
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