TDS Time Machine | Valentine's Day
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Comedy Central
4.2 • 14.2K Ratings
🗓️ 15 February 2025
⏱️ 28 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to Comedy Central. |
| 0:03.0 | Welcome back to the show. |
| 0:04.0 | February 14th has long been a special day for people who aren't drowning in a sea of loneliness. |
| 0:23.3 | But have we forgotten its true meaning? |
| 0:26.5 | Nate Cordry investigates. |
| 0:30.7 | February 14th, the day when we paused to remember the martyrdom of St. Valentine. |
| 0:36.4 | As everyone knows, he married couples in |
| 0:38.6 | defiance of the Emperor Claudius II. For that, he was brutally beheaded. But what was once a sacred |
| 0:48.1 | holiday has been turned into a secular orgy. That's right, there's a war on St. Valentine's Day. |
| 0:59.1 | We have chocolate thongs for women. This is for the guys. And those are very beautiful Valentine's Day |
| 1:06.5 | sweaters. A little lingerie. It's a far cry from the St. Valentine TV specials we remember from our youth. |
| 1:13.6 | This represents the still beating heart ripped from St. Valentine's chest. |
| 1:19.6 | Let us up on his chocolatey love for the Lord. |
| 1:22.6 | And how are profit-hungry retailers cashing in? |
| 1:26.6 | I went undercover for some reason to find out. |
| 1:36.3 | In just 18 short centuries, we've gone from honoring the bloody decapitation of religious martyr |
| 1:42.5 | to dogs in boxer shorts. |
| 1:46.2 | And innocent balloons turn into wanton displays of sexual perversion. |
| 1:51.4 | Do you have a St. Valentine's Day section? |
| 1:54.2 | St. Valentine's Day cards. |
| 1:56.7 | No, St. Valentine's Day cards. |
| 1:59.1 | Not specifically for St. Valentine's Day, no. Yet another example of the war on St. Valentine's Day cards. Not specifically for St. Valentine's Day. |
... |
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